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Parent Emeritus
Will I ever be happy again?
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<blockquote data-quote="MissLulu" data-source="post: 755687" data-attributes="member: 24721"><p>I'm having a particularly bad day today.</p><p></p><p>I'm so tired of thinking about my Difficult Son, worrying about him and worrying about the impact his behaviour has on my other kids.</p><p></p><p>It's not long now until he moves out of our home. (He's moving on March 20.) I know there's only a month or so to go until he's out of my home but right now that feels like forever. I think my despair has been triggered today because he came home from work in a really bad mood. He was barely civil to me, rude to his father and then went out without saying goodbye. I know this doesn't sound like that big of a deal, but this is how he behaves when something is wrong. Now I'm here wondering what it is. Has he lost his job? Is he in legal trouble? Has he had a falling out with friends? It could something major or minor - his mood/personality disorder makes it hard to work out which, because he goes to pieces just as easily over small mishaps as he does over large ones.</p><p></p><p>Whatever it is, major or minor, I'm exhausted from worrying. I guess I want him to leave so badly that I'm afraid something will happen to delay that - losing his job for example. I know I let my imagination run away with me at times, and picture worst case scenarios, but the problem is that sometimes the dramas are major ones. I'm perpetually worried about what is around the corner, even when things are going okay.</p><p></p><p>I'm sitting here typing this and crying. I'm so tired and worried and scared. We have done everything we can think of to help this kid (man now - he's 24) and he is still struggling and does not appear to appreciate what we've done for him. I feel like no matter what happens I can never truly be happy again.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="MissLulu, post: 755687, member: 24721"] I'm having a particularly bad day today. I'm so tired of thinking about my Difficult Son, worrying about him and worrying about the impact his behaviour has on my other kids. It's not long now until he moves out of our home. (He's moving on March 20.) I know there's only a month or so to go until he's out of my home but right now that feels like forever. I think my despair has been triggered today because he came home from work in a really bad mood. He was barely civil to me, rude to his father and then went out without saying goodbye. I know this doesn't sound like that big of a deal, but this is how he behaves when something is wrong. Now I'm here wondering what it is. Has he lost his job? Is he in legal trouble? Has he had a falling out with friends? It could something major or minor - his mood/personality disorder makes it hard to work out which, because he goes to pieces just as easily over small mishaps as he does over large ones. Whatever it is, major or minor, I'm exhausted from worrying. I guess I want him to leave so badly that I'm afraid something will happen to delay that - losing his job for example. I know I let my imagination run away with me at times, and picture worst case scenarios, but the problem is that sometimes the dramas are major ones. I'm perpetually worried about what is around the corner, even when things are going okay. I'm sitting here typing this and crying. I'm so tired and worried and scared. We have done everything we can think of to help this kid (man now - he's 24) and he is still struggling and does not appear to appreciate what we've done for him. I feel like no matter what happens I can never truly be happy again. [/QUOTE]
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Will I ever be happy again?
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