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<blockquote data-quote="Nature" data-source="post: 687666" data-attributes="member: 19011"><p>Hi Echo,</p><p></p><p>I always seem to catch up after the fact but can so relate to the shoes story.</p><p></p><p>A few years ago,my son was incarcerated in a US Detention Centre for 3 years (I'm in Canada).He was on holidays with family members and disappeared. Days of hellish worry as I remember it as we had no idea what happened to him. Eventually, a call came from thousands of miles across my country from someone who passed along the message that he was in a California Detention Centre. Months later, I visited him for the first time at Christmas. It was extremely difficult to get leave from work as I hadn't wanted to tell anyone the reason for my trip and could only get 4 days Leave of Absence with no pay. Visiting is only allowed every second day so I had to visit the day my plane arrived, rushing from the airport to hotel to drop off luggage and straight to the prison where I waited outside for over 2 hrs before being allowed in. I too had been so careful to go over all the literature of what was allowed and what wasn't. They refused to allow me to wear a business type jacket where the website had stated ladies could do so, I never wear those but it said sweaters were not allowed. They also had issues with the wool dress I wore and several had a discussion if I were to be allowed in or not. I wanted to cry as not only was I missing days pay, travelled thousands of miles, plus had to pay for hotel but at that moment I may not be able to see him. Reading your post I understood your feeling of helplessness and frustration. In the end, they let me in and although the website stated if there were too many visitors they would ask some to leave depending on time travelled to get to the prison. I was asked to leave after 1/2 hr even though I had read I would be allowed 2 hrs. The next time I was allowed to go the time also was cut short as it was the Christmas season. I had gone down really early to make sure I would get to see him, again waited 2 hours in line but then made the mistake of going to the ladies room when I entered and as a result had to get back in line. Then they were full so I was asked to return that evening. When I emerged it was dark and I found myself stranded in unfamiliar surroundings. Not the safest place to be in LA whereas it seemed fine in the daytime it was a scary place to be at night time. I had walked the mile from my hotel earlier that day. I came home dejected and sad as I only saw him for a total of hour despite the thousands of dollars I spent. I felt your pain when you described your sadness sitting in your car. I'm sorry if I hijacked your post as this gave me a chance to tell of my experience whereas I've never told anyone about that experience. I just wanted you to know I understood your pain and frustration when your described your sadness in your car. </p><p>As for the update I am wishing the best for your son and all of you. I hope that he is allowed to attend that facility. The fact that he is willing to stay in jail for a possibility of a placement shows he perhaps wants to receive help and walk a different path. I will be thinking of you both. Hugs to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nature, post: 687666, member: 19011"] Hi Echo, I always seem to catch up after the fact but can so relate to the shoes story. A few years ago,my son was incarcerated in a US Detention Centre for 3 years (I'm in Canada).He was on holidays with family members and disappeared. Days of hellish worry as I remember it as we had no idea what happened to him. Eventually, a call came from thousands of miles across my country from someone who passed along the message that he was in a California Detention Centre. Months later, I visited him for the first time at Christmas. It was extremely difficult to get leave from work as I hadn't wanted to tell anyone the reason for my trip and could only get 4 days Leave of Absence with no pay. Visiting is only allowed every second day so I had to visit the day my plane arrived, rushing from the airport to hotel to drop off luggage and straight to the prison where I waited outside for over 2 hrs before being allowed in. I too had been so careful to go over all the literature of what was allowed and what wasn't. They refused to allow me to wear a business type jacket where the website had stated ladies could do so, I never wear those but it said sweaters were not allowed. They also had issues with the wool dress I wore and several had a discussion if I were to be allowed in or not. I wanted to cry as not only was I missing days pay, travelled thousands of miles, plus had to pay for hotel but at that moment I may not be able to see him. Reading your post I understood your feeling of helplessness and frustration. In the end, they let me in and although the website stated if there were too many visitors they would ask some to leave depending on time travelled to get to the prison. I was asked to leave after 1/2 hr even though I had read I would be allowed 2 hrs. The next time I was allowed to go the time also was cut short as it was the Christmas season. I had gone down really early to make sure I would get to see him, again waited 2 hours in line but then made the mistake of going to the ladies room when I entered and as a result had to get back in line. Then they were full so I was asked to return that evening. When I emerged it was dark and I found myself stranded in unfamiliar surroundings. Not the safest place to be in LA whereas it seemed fine in the daytime it was a scary place to be at night time. I had walked the mile from my hotel earlier that day. I came home dejected and sad as I only saw him for a total of hour despite the thousands of dollars I spent. I felt your pain when you described your sadness sitting in your car. I'm sorry if I hijacked your post as this gave me a chance to tell of my experience whereas I've never told anyone about that experience. I just wanted you to know I understood your pain and frustration when your described your sadness in your car. As for the update I am wishing the best for your son and all of you. I hope that he is allowed to attend that facility. The fact that he is willing to stay in jail for a possibility of a placement shows he perhaps wants to receive help and walk a different path. I will be thinking of you both. Hugs to you. [/QUOTE]
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