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Substance Abuse
worst nightmare confirmed,every criminal has a mother
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 631350" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hon, calm down. Please.</p><p></p><p>My daughter never tried to get my sympathy by telling me the dangerous things she did when she used drugs, but the fact is, she had drug dealers after her. I heard the gory details after she quit, and it still makes me ill when I think about it.</p><p></p><p>The drug life is dangerous. And the only thing your son can do to avoid these types of situations is to stop taking drugs. You do not know the real story going on here. Our drug abusing adult kids fudge things a lot. My daughter once went with some kooky drug abusers, of which she was one at the time, while they pulled off a robbery at a liquor store. The head idiot had a gun. My daughter was not charged, but I'm just glad she didn't share this with me because there would have been nothing I could have done.</p><p></p><p>By then she was nineteen and close to being thrown out of the house because the cops kept visiting us and I had two younger kids who were terrified and it was ruining the health of the rest of us. Your son an go to rehab tonight. He will be safe there. He will not be any safer in your house nor can you defend him when he gets involved with dangerous people. And, like my daughter, he is choosing to hang around with them and get involved in their stuff. Your son sounds even more self-destructive than my daughter. He was the driver. Hon, if they break the law, they can go to jail and then prison. Will the judge send him there if he is caught? Maybe not. He is playing with fire, but you can't do anything to stop him. He didn't say the magic words, "I want help. Take me to rehab. I'm done using drugs." In fact, he admitted he snorts Adderrall, something my daughter says is very coveted on the streets. I hate ADHD drugs. The kids steal them from their siblings, crush them in pillcrushers, and snort them. They go for $10/pill on the street, my daughter told me. All ADHD drugs are used, but Adderrall is most liked. Her brother had Adderrall and it kept going missing. I didn't want to believe she was tasking it. She said she wasn't.</p><p></p><p>Of course, after she quit I learned the truth. I was dumbfounded when my daughter told me this. Sometimes they do straight Adderrall, then need downers to go to sleep. Sometimes they use cocaine or something else along with it. The drug life is a nightmare that only they can stop. My daughter quit because she told me The Life was just too hard and she was sick of it and herself.</p><p></p><p>What can you do? Nothing. Hope your son comes to his senses and goes to a rehab to REALLY get clean. He will come into contact with these thugs, and be one of them, until he stops. He never should have befriended such a person in the first place, but my daughter had friends or I should say "friends"that twisted my gut. The best thing that happaened to her was when we threw her out and she talked her brother from another state into letting her stay in his basement. Nobody knew where she was and, instead of befriending druggies in the new state, she quit.</p><p></p><p>This journey is your son's. He knows you will support him if he goes to rehab and that will temporarily get him off the streets, but he isn't offering to do so.</p><p></p><p>You need to take care of yourself. You have a little one who needs you sane and healthy. You in my opinion need to take care of YOU now and go to Al-Anon or Narc-Anon and talk face-to-face with other parents who have gone through your horror and can give you coping skills. How in the world can you help your son fight a criminal? Your son was not being rational. Now, in my opinion, the best thing to do, out of no good options for his safety, is to turn the bag and it's contents into the police so at least they may look more favorably on him and perhaps they will arrest this guy and he'll be in jail and not on the streets? But they never turn one another in.</p><p></p><p>I used to think my daughter would end up in prison or dead. Neither happened, but that was due to her. Only your son can make his life better. I wish there was a magic wand for all of us to fix our adult children who live a dangerous lifestyle. Honestly, I do. But all we can do is fix ourselves and learn to cope with having an adult child who is involved with drugs and criminals. It IS possible to do it. Your being sick over this will not help your son. Only he can help himself.</p><p></p><p>Please, please, try Al-Anon meetings. Like COM says, go five or six times before you judge. They kept me sane and gave me the courage I needed.</p><p></p><p>God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I can not change,</p><p>the COURAGE to change the things I can,</p><p>and the WISDOM to know the difference.</p><p></p><p>I had a necklace with this prayer on it at one time and I touched it every time I felt weak in the knees over my daughter. Many, many hugs for your hurting and scared mommy help and we are all with you, holding your hand. We understand. We've been there. Keep in touch and try, just try, to do something for yourself and go to a meeting. I think Twelve Steps programs are especially helpful if you have a higher power in your life and you do. For now, think of God and talk to him and try to find some serenity in giving your son's welfare over to Him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 631350, member: 1550"] Hon, calm down. Please. My daughter never tried to get my sympathy by telling me the dangerous things she did when she used drugs, but the fact is, she had drug dealers after her. I heard the gory details after she quit, and it still makes me ill when I think about it. The drug life is dangerous. And the only thing your son can do to avoid these types of situations is to stop taking drugs. You do not know the real story going on here. Our drug abusing adult kids fudge things a lot. My daughter once went with some kooky drug abusers, of which she was one at the time, while they pulled off a robbery at a liquor store. The head idiot had a gun. My daughter was not charged, but I'm just glad she didn't share this with me because there would have been nothing I could have done. By then she was nineteen and close to being thrown out of the house because the cops kept visiting us and I had two younger kids who were terrified and it was ruining the health of the rest of us. Your son an go to rehab tonight. He will be safe there. He will not be any safer in your house nor can you defend him when he gets involved with dangerous people. And, like my daughter, he is choosing to hang around with them and get involved in their stuff. Your son sounds even more self-destructive than my daughter. He was the driver. Hon, if they break the law, they can go to jail and then prison. Will the judge send him there if he is caught? Maybe not. He is playing with fire, but you can't do anything to stop him. He didn't say the magic words, "I want help. Take me to rehab. I'm done using drugs." In fact, he admitted he snorts Adderrall, something my daughter says is very coveted on the streets. I hate ADHD drugs. The kids steal them from their siblings, crush them in pillcrushers, and snort them. They go for $10/pill on the street, my daughter told me. All ADHD drugs are used, but Adderrall is most liked. Her brother had Adderrall and it kept going missing. I didn't want to believe she was tasking it. She said she wasn't. Of course, after she quit I learned the truth. I was dumbfounded when my daughter told me this. Sometimes they do straight Adderrall, then need downers to go to sleep. Sometimes they use cocaine or something else along with it. The drug life is a nightmare that only they can stop. My daughter quit because she told me The Life was just too hard and she was sick of it and herself. What can you do? Nothing. Hope your son comes to his senses and goes to a rehab to REALLY get clean. He will come into contact with these thugs, and be one of them, until he stops. He never should have befriended such a person in the first place, but my daughter had friends or I should say "friends"that twisted my gut. The best thing that happaened to her was when we threw her out and she talked her brother from another state into letting her stay in his basement. Nobody knew where she was and, instead of befriending druggies in the new state, she quit. This journey is your son's. He knows you will support him if he goes to rehab and that will temporarily get him off the streets, but he isn't offering to do so. You need to take care of yourself. You have a little one who needs you sane and healthy. You in my opinion need to take care of YOU now and go to Al-Anon or Narc-Anon and talk face-to-face with other parents who have gone through your horror and can give you coping skills. How in the world can you help your son fight a criminal? Your son was not being rational. Now, in my opinion, the best thing to do, out of no good options for his safety, is to turn the bag and it's contents into the police so at least they may look more favorably on him and perhaps they will arrest this guy and he'll be in jail and not on the streets? But they never turn one another in. I used to think my daughter would end up in prison or dead. Neither happened, but that was due to her. Only your son can make his life better. I wish there was a magic wand for all of us to fix our adult children who live a dangerous lifestyle. Honestly, I do. But all we can do is fix ourselves and learn to cope with having an adult child who is involved with drugs and criminals. It IS possible to do it. Your being sick over this will not help your son. Only he can help himself. Please, please, try Al-Anon meetings. Like COM says, go five or six times before you judge. They kept me sane and gave me the courage I needed. God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I can not change, the COURAGE to change the things I can, and the WISDOM to know the difference. I had a necklace with this prayer on it at one time and I touched it every time I felt weak in the knees over my daughter. Many, many hugs for your hurting and scared mommy help and we are all with you, holding your hand. We understand. We've been there. Keep in touch and try, just try, to do something for yourself and go to a meeting. I think Twelve Steps programs are especially helpful if you have a higher power in your life and you do. For now, think of God and talk to him and try to find some serenity in giving your son's welfare over to Him. [/QUOTE]
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