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General Parenting
Would it be better to split up than both of us suffering?
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<blockquote data-quote="BloodiedButUnbowed" data-source="post: 734783" data-attributes="member: 13303"><p>If you and your husband love each other and want the marriage, you'll make it through this difficult time.</p><p></p><p>My marriage has suffered greatly at times due to the chaos caused by both of my stepsons. At the moment we are no contact with them - their choice - and that's definitely reduced the stress in my household, as much as my wife misses them, she knows she cannot change their minds at this time and she has accepted the reality of the situation.</p><p></p><p>Despite the drama and upheaval they have caused, I have affection for my stepsons and I would never say they ruined my life, or even my marriage. In my case, my wife has anger management issues that she won't address, and those issues - marital issues - are way more important to the quality of the marriage.</p><p></p><p>I understand your feelings of guilt over your son's difficulties, but don't assume your husband blames you or wishes he hadn't married you because of them. Have the two of you sat down to talk? Maybe hubby just needs some "me time" on his own or with his family/male buddies to get away every once in a while. Much less extreme than blowing up a marriage unnecessarily!</p><p></p><p>Best of luck and from what you write I feel quite sure you two will make it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BloodiedButUnbowed, post: 734783, member: 13303"] If you and your husband love each other and want the marriage, you'll make it through this difficult time. My marriage has suffered greatly at times due to the chaos caused by both of my stepsons. At the moment we are no contact with them - their choice - and that's definitely reduced the stress in my household, as much as my wife misses them, she knows she cannot change their minds at this time and she has accepted the reality of the situation. Despite the drama and upheaval they have caused, I have affection for my stepsons and I would never say they ruined my life, or even my marriage. In my case, my wife has anger management issues that she won't address, and those issues - marital issues - are way more important to the quality of the marriage. I understand your feelings of guilt over your son's difficulties, but don't assume your husband blames you or wishes he hadn't married you because of them. Have the two of you sat down to talk? Maybe hubby just needs some "me time" on his own or with his family/male buddies to get away every once in a while. Much less extreme than blowing up a marriage unnecessarily! Best of luck and from what you write I feel quite sure you two will make it. [/QUOTE]
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Would it be better to split up than both of us suffering?
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