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You might have a difficult child if...
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 172145" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>18.) You and 5 of the neighborhood kids can NOT make a wading pool out of moms hand dug koi pond even if you capture the koi and put them in a bucket. </p><p> </p><p>19.) Koi do NOT need to be saved from freezing by putting hot water in the dogs tin washtub and bringing them in the house. Floating koi do not revive when put in the toilet. </p><p> </p><p>20.) Matchbox cars, contrary to popular belief, can not be microwaved for 1 minute to remove the paint so you can use moms nail polish to paint a Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) scheme. </p><p> </p><p>21.) Firemen do not like to show up at a house to save a Matchbox car. </p><p> </p><p>22.) Spraying the dull linoleum in a kitchen with clear varnish will NOT restore the lustre and will NOT restore your mother's faith in your painting abilities even though you still have no microwave. </p><p> </p><p>22.) Setting a Jaba toad, a 12' python, a tortise, and iguana, and a squirrel free does not qualify you as Marlin Perkins, but does make you popular with pre-teen neighbor kids who found the 4lb flattened toad on the road and didnt' know toads can have teeth. </p><p> </p><p>23.) Shooting an arrow at your mother with an long bow, while she's filming you can be grounds for admittance into a psychiatric. hospital. </p><p> </p><p>24.) Draino (from a neighbors trash can and not wrapped either) but, sprinkled onto aluminum foil causes a chemical reaction that mimics a matchbox car in a microwave. Neato. </p><p> </p><p>25.) Baby rats running in a house will not be stopped by tossing a tennis shoe at their path for freedom - they will be killed. </p><p> </p><p>26.) Mass quantities of Hubba Bubba in the most revolting flavor once leaving your mouth and globbed onto your hair to get a laugh will most definitely be cut out. As your mother thinks the smell of pnut butter is revolting. </p><p> </p><p>27.) Don't sport a mohawk hair cut (from showing off with Hubba Bubba) at a 7 year old day care and not come home in a bad mood after being called every Native American Chief name (however incorrect) in the world. Not to mention the 30 or so gouges and cuts into the fidgity, ADHD childs head from a mother who never held a pair of clippers to human hair. </p><p> </p><p>28.) DO NOT take your step fathers biker magazines with his friends pictures in them and hand them out to your buddies to see boobies - Dad takes a.) a very dim view of you getting into his locked cabinet when he's sleeping and b.) not being able to replace the magazines as they are eons old from his "younger" days. </p><p> </p><p>29.) If you SHOOT a BB gun at a Direct TV dish - your parents WILL get endless, crappy reception and endless hours on the phone with idiot, 3rd world representatives to the point of divorce before marriage. </p><p> </p><p>30.) If you take all the valve stem covers from all your neighbors cars, and your mom washes them YOU WILL BE OUT IN FORCE knocking on doors, apologizing and putting them ALL back on every car you took them from. </p><p> </p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/whiteflag.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":whiteflag:" title="whiteflag :whiteflag:" data-shortname=":whiteflag:" /><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/whiteflag.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":whiteflag:" title="whiteflag :whiteflag:" data-shortname=":whiteflag:" /><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/whiteflag.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":whiteflag:" title="whiteflag :whiteflag:" data-shortname=":whiteflag:" /></p><p> </p><p>-I love #9.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 172145, member: 4964"] 18.) You and 5 of the neighborhood kids can NOT make a wading pool out of moms hand dug koi pond even if you capture the koi and put them in a bucket. 19.) Koi do NOT need to be saved from freezing by putting hot water in the dogs tin washtub and bringing them in the house. Floating koi do not revive when put in the toilet. 20.) Matchbox cars, contrary to popular belief, can not be microwaved for 1 minute to remove the paint so you can use moms nail polish to paint a Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) scheme. 21.) Firemen do not like to show up at a house to save a Matchbox car. 22.) Spraying the dull linoleum in a kitchen with clear varnish will NOT restore the lustre and will NOT restore your mother's faith in your painting abilities even though you still have no microwave. 22.) Setting a Jaba toad, a 12' python, a tortise, and iguana, and a squirrel free does not qualify you as Marlin Perkins, but does make you popular with pre-teen neighbor kids who found the 4lb flattened toad on the road and didnt' know toads can have teeth. 23.) Shooting an arrow at your mother with an long bow, while she's filming you can be grounds for admittance into a psychiatric. hospital. 24.) Draino (from a neighbors trash can and not wrapped either) but, sprinkled onto aluminum foil causes a chemical reaction that mimics a matchbox car in a microwave. Neato. 25.) Baby rats running in a house will not be stopped by tossing a tennis shoe at their path for freedom - they will be killed. 26.) Mass quantities of Hubba Bubba in the most revolting flavor once leaving your mouth and globbed onto your hair to get a laugh will most definitely be cut out. As your mother thinks the smell of pnut butter is revolting. 27.) Don't sport a mohawk hair cut (from showing off with Hubba Bubba) at a 7 year old day care and not come home in a bad mood after being called every Native American Chief name (however incorrect) in the world. Not to mention the 30 or so gouges and cuts into the fidgity, ADHD childs head from a mother who never held a pair of clippers to human hair. 28.) DO NOT take your step fathers biker magazines with his friends pictures in them and hand them out to your buddies to see boobies - Dad takes a.) a very dim view of you getting into his locked cabinet when he's sleeping and b.) not being able to replace the magazines as they are eons old from his "younger" days. 29.) If you SHOOT a BB gun at a Direct TV dish - your parents WILL get endless, crappy reception and endless hours on the phone with idiot, 3rd world representatives to the point of divorce before marriage. 30.) If you take all the valve stem covers from all your neighbors cars, and your mom washes them YOU WILL BE OUT IN FORCE knocking on doors, apologizing and putting them ALL back on every car you took them from. :whiteflag::whiteflag::whiteflag: -I love #9. [/QUOTE]
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