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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 384453" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Day 3:</p><p></p><p>More of the same.<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /> Katie still calling shelters, churches, ect. </p><p></p><p>Then took her and her husband out to the college to find out how soon Katie has to enroll in order to sign up for winter classes. Well since the last time she was here she dropped 2 classes.......she owes the college money. Good thing is it is only 260.00. Another good thing is she can still do her FASFA ect, that 260.00 just has to be paid by the beginning of winter quarter. Not great but not too horrible. </p><p></p><p>Next stop was turning point for her husband. Well......they talked to the secretary who didn't seem to know much so they're going back monday and trying again.</p><p></p><p>Then we went to community action. Unfortunately they can't do much until they are actually in an apartment. But we did get a head start app for Evan and if they can squeeze him in he should be able to be evaled via the school.</p><p></p><p>Then went to several places so they could put in apps. One is quite promising......they need help desperately only issue with that one is they'd run out of applications but should have more by monday.</p><p></p><p>On the way home I made sure to drive by the catholic church. I knew the name of it......but we couldn't find it in the phone book. Stopped in hoping to speak to the priest, but he was in cincy.....but woman we spoke to said they also may be able to help with motel cost and we're waiting to here from the catholic charity. (I've been hearing the name for 2 days and still can't remember what it's called lol) So at least now 2 possibles for getting the motel fee covered. </p><p></p><p>Then back home because by then husband and Travis had had the kids for several hours. lol (but each time papa has watched them they've been angels) </p><p></p><p>But it didn't stop there. More phone calls because they still had the welfare acct to close out in Mo. katie just kept calling until she finally got a supervisor. Turns out they were due for reapplication so acct is closed. They just need a fax from the kids telling them they want to keep it closed out, then they'll fax the welfare office here and they're good to go once we get the money to send off for birth certificates.</p><p></p><p>Now the kids had already informed our welfare office of what the shelter was doing with the food stamp cards of clients. Today katie also informed the supervisor she spoke too. Neither welfare office were happy.......I'm pretty sure the shelter will be investigated soon.</p><p></p><p>Once that was done katie called the wilmington shelter to check for openings. (the woman wants her to call daily in case someone leaves) The spot for the kids <strong>should</strong> be open by thursday. But as the shelter staff told katie the woman has backed out before or may leave earlier so keep calling.</p><p></p><p>husband and I made a quick trip to the store to pick up a few things I could stretch.......I am hoping it will hold us until the food pantry opens monday or until his social security check on wed. We had less than 40 bucks to spend on food..... hoovers but what can you do? I went with husband to make sure he didn't waste it on something stupid and also to get a short break from the over crowded house.</p><p></p><p>Ok now about katies biomom. They left her behind in St. Louis. She didn't want to come here, they weren't really wanting her to come here......they've been trying to take care of her too for the past 5 yrs......because they knew it would be hard enough trying to get on their feet just as the family......and well heck, she didn't want to come either.</p><p></p><p>Biomom called 1st nite just as husband had left to take the kids to the motel. First she wanted to make sure they'd made it safe. Two she'd just discovered that she had an extension on her unemployment to claim. (that last one that went thru) So all she had to do was go down to unemployment and fill out the paperwork and thursday she'd have the 2000.00 that had been just sitting there for lord knows how long. </p><p></p><p>Katie spoke with her yesterday. The kids were scared.....no faking going on there.......for both her safety and that the shelter would take the money from her for "rent" with the threat if she didn't give it to them they'd throw her out. Katie warned her repeatedly NOT to tell a soul that she was getting ANY money and pleaded with her to go back to Springfield where she knew where to get help and has friends who will be glad to help her. Well.........turns out biomom had changed her mind and wants to come to ohio too......Katie tried to explain that doing so would only make matters worse for them......So then she wanted to stay in the st. louis shelter. Then the kids go really scared, pleaded with her to please go back to springfield where she'd be safe.</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately Katie wasn't sure she'd convinced her to do that.</p><p></p><p>Biomom calls tonight. She supposedly has told no one about the money coming to her. It took a LOT of talking, begging, pleading and explaining from katie, her husband, and myself that her only viable option was to return to Springfield where she will be safe. I had to tell biomom that there was positively NO ROOM AT THE INN! But she's scared to be alone in springfield.......well, ok I don't blame her she's husband's age and katie is her ONLY family. So we explained to her that to come now she would only make it much tougher on the kids to start over and get on their feet. She could use the money to return to springfield. Once the kids are stable and doing well the plan is to bring her over and set her up into a shelter and then help her to become independent as well. She agreed when the kids told her it's only temporary. Ok so it may take months.....whatever, but she will eventually be brought over so she won't be all alone.</p><p></p><p>Now we just have to hope she doesn't change her mind. omg Cuz there is no way her and husband could be under the same roof. lmao I get along with her fine........he's the one with issues.<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /> And I am NOT adding another person to this mess.</p><p></p><p>The kids did not ask to stay with us. I didn't offer either. Instead when bedtime for the grands was near I had them pick up the toys they were playing with in the dining room. I vacuumed. I told husband to dig out our air mattress and pump out of the family room. I put a sheet on it and one of those microfiber blankets. No pillows.....I don't have extra. All 5 are sleeping on a full size air mattress. No complains from any of them. Not a word.</p><p></p><p>Betsy's crate was moved to the livingroom which has a door that can be closed. Worked out ok. They have a place to sleep. It's not luxury by a long shot.......husband was going to offer them our pillows from upstairs.....I nixed the idea as katies husband was already busy making pillows out of rolled up clean clothing that was soft.</p><p></p><p>Bit worried as katie is about to run out of her medications for the seizures and the migraines. No refills for either......so we'll just have to cope as best we can.</p><p></p><p>In the morning I'm going with Nichole and easy child to the new thrift store I found. easy child wants to look at the new dressers they have there and wanted me to show her where it is......then invited Nichole since her boyfriend has to come down early to fix his car. Would have invited katie but then 3 kids and her husband would've wanted to go and that's just too many people. Later in the day is supper at easy child's house where the kids can play with their cousins in her huge backyard..........and I have at least 1 meal I don't have to cook.</p><p></p><p>I faced a dilemma this evening. After buying what little food we did we were broke. Except that I've been carrying around xmas money (teeny bit left from my school loan and the yard sale) forever......literally it does not leave my bodily possession. So I thought.......I could pay for 1 more nite in the motel and pray that either the priest or the pastor comes through.......or I could svck it up, face reality and just deal with the fact that at this moment they had no where else to go. But paying for the motel would only put us out more money none of us have to spend.......and odds are they'd been in my dining room tomorrow nite anyway. Then I had to decide if a couple of hours of peace and quiet were worth 46 bucks.</p><p></p><p>I don't feel I made the wrong choice. Both katie and her husband are still difficult children.........but are showing me they're trying hard and more than very willing to turn their lives around. I do see much more maturity than I saw before this shelter ordeal......much. They're not all the way there yet.....which is why I didn't have husband offer our pillows.....didn't attempt to find some other way for them not to have to sleep 5 in a bed......because I don't want to make it so comfy here that they loose this motivation for change.</p><p></p><p>Katie's husband told me he's going through computer withdrawl. Told him no one uses my computer but ME. period. And it's password protected so that husband can't even log onto it. We had Travis do the same for husband's laptop......with the same rule.....it's papa's with hands off. I told her husband that Travis could walk them down to the library, they could get a card and use their computers. lol </p><p></p><p>In the morning while I'm off to the thrift store husband can take them around to some more places to put in apps........and yes they can take the kids. I'm sure they'll survive. lol </p><p></p><p>Sunday they'll be helping me clean. Nichole should have the rest of her stuff out of here which will make it easier.</p><p></p><p>Will say I'm more than pleased with the grands as well. I don't have things here geared for above age 6. So they're somewhat bored unless it's warm enough to go outside. They've been good, well mannered. Only some normal sib stuff a bit of difficult child stuff from the boys......used to that because of Travis, but Mom and Dad were on top of it.</p><p></p><p>Molly and Bruce are being overloved. Betsy would be but she can't decide if she's too scared or if she wants them to love her too. So we're introducing her slowly to them. Poor thing didn't get a chance at much socialization due to my being in school her whole life.</p><p></p><p>Funny part : I think I can deal ok (at least with what I've seen so far) with katie's husband. He reminds me of my brothers. lmao Maybe a bit rougher around the edges as in between foster homes he basically raised himself.......But he loves Katie. He adores those kids. And even though he complains about how biomom drives him nuts with the stuff she does........I saw the worry and fear on his face when they found out she was getting that money and planning to stay in st.louis in the shelter......and I watched HIM get on the phone and beg her to go back to springfield where it was safe too. He is upset and extremely worried someone will seriously hurt her or kill her to get their hands on that money.</p><p></p><p>Ok, so he's still got the perv thing that will never get outta my head................But I see things that show me underneath the bravado ect.......well, dammit I see potential there if he can be kept on the right track. I just think no one ever cared enough to bother before.</p><p></p><p>But still have no expectations. With this I'm taking it one day at a time. It's better that way</p><p></p><p>Me? There have been a few moments when I've been brought to tears. Tears of frustration mostly........and that I'm not going to be able to make the food stretch until we have money to buy more.........frustration that the kids are trying so hard and are still sleeping on my floor.</p><p></p><p>I still am not eating. Tried to eat cottage cheese and almost choked on it. So I'm surviving on pudding and V8. No I know it's not good.........but I don't have money for much else. And I do have some creamed soups in the house.......but during the day we're running and in the evening I'm so tired I have to force myself to eat the pudding. And since the weather has turned cold again.....the pain is doing nothing for my appetite.</p><p></p><p>I'm surprised I haven't passed out from lack of calories ect. lol I'm dropping weight fast even though I'm holding water. After tues it won't be so bad though, the stitches will be out.</p><p></p><p>Tomorrow I'm going to also have katie and her husband make a list of goals. I want them to check each one off as they accomplish it. First priority is a roof over their heads, 2nd is food, 3 is jobs (which may come before the other 2 but that can't be counted on) ect. I want them to <strong>see</strong> what they've accomplished as they reach each goal. Because frankly this process is hard....it's easy to get frustrated and overwhelmed. And that way they'll feel the accomplishment as each goal is met.</p><p></p><p>Keep praying please, it does seem to be helping.</p><p></p><p>hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 384453, member: 84"] Day 3: More of the same.:raspberry-tounge: Katie still calling shelters, churches, ect. Then took her and her husband out to the college to find out how soon Katie has to enroll in order to sign up for winter classes. Well since the last time she was here she dropped 2 classes.......she owes the college money. Good thing is it is only 260.00. Another good thing is she can still do her FASFA ect, that 260.00 just has to be paid by the beginning of winter quarter. Not great but not too horrible. Next stop was turning point for her husband. Well......they talked to the secretary who didn't seem to know much so they're going back monday and trying again. Then we went to community action. Unfortunately they can't do much until they are actually in an apartment. But we did get a head start app for Evan and if they can squeeze him in he should be able to be evaled via the school. Then went to several places so they could put in apps. One is quite promising......they need help desperately only issue with that one is they'd run out of applications but should have more by monday. On the way home I made sure to drive by the catholic church. I knew the name of it......but we couldn't find it in the phone book. Stopped in hoping to speak to the priest, but he was in cincy.....but woman we spoke to said they also may be able to help with motel cost and we're waiting to here from the catholic charity. (I've been hearing the name for 2 days and still can't remember what it's called lol) So at least now 2 possibles for getting the motel fee covered. Then back home because by then husband and Travis had had the kids for several hours. lol (but each time papa has watched them they've been angels) But it didn't stop there. More phone calls because they still had the welfare acct to close out in Mo. katie just kept calling until she finally got a supervisor. Turns out they were due for reapplication so acct is closed. They just need a fax from the kids telling them they want to keep it closed out, then they'll fax the welfare office here and they're good to go once we get the money to send off for birth certificates. Now the kids had already informed our welfare office of what the shelter was doing with the food stamp cards of clients. Today katie also informed the supervisor she spoke too. Neither welfare office were happy.......I'm pretty sure the shelter will be investigated soon. Once that was done katie called the wilmington shelter to check for openings. (the woman wants her to call daily in case someone leaves) The spot for the kids [B]should[/B] be open by thursday. But as the shelter staff told katie the woman has backed out before or may leave earlier so keep calling. husband and I made a quick trip to the store to pick up a few things I could stretch.......I am hoping it will hold us until the food pantry opens monday or until his social security check on wed. We had less than 40 bucks to spend on food..... hoovers but what can you do? I went with husband to make sure he didn't waste it on something stupid and also to get a short break from the over crowded house. Ok now about katies biomom. They left her behind in St. Louis. She didn't want to come here, they weren't really wanting her to come here......they've been trying to take care of her too for the past 5 yrs......because they knew it would be hard enough trying to get on their feet just as the family......and well heck, she didn't want to come either. Biomom called 1st nite just as husband had left to take the kids to the motel. First she wanted to make sure they'd made it safe. Two she'd just discovered that she had an extension on her unemployment to claim. (that last one that went thru) So all she had to do was go down to unemployment and fill out the paperwork and thursday she'd have the 2000.00 that had been just sitting there for lord knows how long. Katie spoke with her yesterday. The kids were scared.....no faking going on there.......for both her safety and that the shelter would take the money from her for "rent" with the threat if she didn't give it to them they'd throw her out. Katie warned her repeatedly NOT to tell a soul that she was getting ANY money and pleaded with her to go back to Springfield where she knew where to get help and has friends who will be glad to help her. Well.........turns out biomom had changed her mind and wants to come to ohio too......Katie tried to explain that doing so would only make matters worse for them......So then she wanted to stay in the st. louis shelter. Then the kids go really scared, pleaded with her to please go back to springfield where she'd be safe. Unfortunately Katie wasn't sure she'd convinced her to do that. Biomom calls tonight. She supposedly has told no one about the money coming to her. It took a LOT of talking, begging, pleading and explaining from katie, her husband, and myself that her only viable option was to return to Springfield where she will be safe. I had to tell biomom that there was positively NO ROOM AT THE INN! But she's scared to be alone in springfield.......well, ok I don't blame her she's husband's age and katie is her ONLY family. So we explained to her that to come now she would only make it much tougher on the kids to start over and get on their feet. She could use the money to return to springfield. Once the kids are stable and doing well the plan is to bring her over and set her up into a shelter and then help her to become independent as well. She agreed when the kids told her it's only temporary. Ok so it may take months.....whatever, but she will eventually be brought over so she won't be all alone. Now we just have to hope she doesn't change her mind. omg Cuz there is no way her and husband could be under the same roof. lmao I get along with her fine........he's the one with issues.:raspberry-tounge: And I am NOT adding another person to this mess. The kids did not ask to stay with us. I didn't offer either. Instead when bedtime for the grands was near I had them pick up the toys they were playing with in the dining room. I vacuumed. I told husband to dig out our air mattress and pump out of the family room. I put a sheet on it and one of those microfiber blankets. No pillows.....I don't have extra. All 5 are sleeping on a full size air mattress. No complains from any of them. Not a word. Betsy's crate was moved to the livingroom which has a door that can be closed. Worked out ok. They have a place to sleep. It's not luxury by a long shot.......husband was going to offer them our pillows from upstairs.....I nixed the idea as katies husband was already busy making pillows out of rolled up clean clothing that was soft. Bit worried as katie is about to run out of her medications for the seizures and the migraines. No refills for either......so we'll just have to cope as best we can. In the morning I'm going with Nichole and easy child to the new thrift store I found. easy child wants to look at the new dressers they have there and wanted me to show her where it is......then invited Nichole since her boyfriend has to come down early to fix his car. Would have invited katie but then 3 kids and her husband would've wanted to go and that's just too many people. Later in the day is supper at easy child's house where the kids can play with their cousins in her huge backyard..........and I have at least 1 meal I don't have to cook. I faced a dilemma this evening. After buying what little food we did we were broke. Except that I've been carrying around xmas money (teeny bit left from my school loan and the yard sale) forever......literally it does not leave my bodily possession. So I thought.......I could pay for 1 more nite in the motel and pray that either the priest or the pastor comes through.......or I could svck it up, face reality and just deal with the fact that at this moment they had no where else to go. But paying for the motel would only put us out more money none of us have to spend.......and odds are they'd been in my dining room tomorrow nite anyway. Then I had to decide if a couple of hours of peace and quiet were worth 46 bucks. I don't feel I made the wrong choice. Both katie and her husband are still difficult children.........but are showing me they're trying hard and more than very willing to turn their lives around. I do see much more maturity than I saw before this shelter ordeal......much. They're not all the way there yet.....which is why I didn't have husband offer our pillows.....didn't attempt to find some other way for them not to have to sleep 5 in a bed......because I don't want to make it so comfy here that they loose this motivation for change. Katie's husband told me he's going through computer withdrawl. Told him no one uses my computer but ME. period. And it's password protected so that husband can't even log onto it. We had Travis do the same for husband's laptop......with the same rule.....it's papa's with hands off. I told her husband that Travis could walk them down to the library, they could get a card and use their computers. lol In the morning while I'm off to the thrift store husband can take them around to some more places to put in apps........and yes they can take the kids. I'm sure they'll survive. lol Sunday they'll be helping me clean. Nichole should have the rest of her stuff out of here which will make it easier. Will say I'm more than pleased with the grands as well. I don't have things here geared for above age 6. So they're somewhat bored unless it's warm enough to go outside. They've been good, well mannered. Only some normal sib stuff a bit of difficult child stuff from the boys......used to that because of Travis, but Mom and Dad were on top of it. Molly and Bruce are being overloved. Betsy would be but she can't decide if she's too scared or if she wants them to love her too. So we're introducing her slowly to them. Poor thing didn't get a chance at much socialization due to my being in school her whole life. Funny part : I think I can deal ok (at least with what I've seen so far) with katie's husband. He reminds me of my brothers. lmao Maybe a bit rougher around the edges as in between foster homes he basically raised himself.......But he loves Katie. He adores those kids. And even though he complains about how biomom drives him nuts with the stuff she does........I saw the worry and fear on his face when they found out she was getting that money and planning to stay in st.louis in the shelter......and I watched HIM get on the phone and beg her to go back to springfield where it was safe too. He is upset and extremely worried someone will seriously hurt her or kill her to get their hands on that money. Ok, so he's still got the perv thing that will never get outta my head................But I see things that show me underneath the bravado ect.......well, dammit I see potential there if he can be kept on the right track. I just think no one ever cared enough to bother before. But still have no expectations. With this I'm taking it one day at a time. It's better that way Me? There have been a few moments when I've been brought to tears. Tears of frustration mostly........and that I'm not going to be able to make the food stretch until we have money to buy more.........frustration that the kids are trying so hard and are still sleeping on my floor. I still am not eating. Tried to eat cottage cheese and almost choked on it. So I'm surviving on pudding and V8. No I know it's not good.........but I don't have money for much else. And I do have some creamed soups in the house.......but during the day we're running and in the evening I'm so tired I have to force myself to eat the pudding. And since the weather has turned cold again.....the pain is doing nothing for my appetite. I'm surprised I haven't passed out from lack of calories ect. lol I'm dropping weight fast even though I'm holding water. After tues it won't be so bad though, the stitches will be out. Tomorrow I'm going to also have katie and her husband make a list of goals. I want them to check each one off as they accomplish it. First priority is a roof over their heads, 2nd is food, 3 is jobs (which may come before the other 2 but that can't be counted on) ect. I want them to [B]see[/B] what they've accomplished as they reach each goal. Because frankly this process is hard....it's easy to get frustrated and overwhelmed. And that way they'll feel the accomplishment as each goal is met. Keep praying please, it does seem to be helping. hugs [/QUOTE]
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