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Oh I so relate. My son does the same. I took him to the dentist last week and among other things says, if that f bus doesn't f move in the next f 3 seconds I'm going to punch him in the f face !!! I sat quietly thinking 'why is this my life'. But I have decided that if he asked again I am going...

After a period of calm, I feel like I'm back where I started. My Difficult Child has just lost his job. The poor me messages have started. I feel like I have to back off just when he needs me. I hate it. If I left him in he'll eat me alive emotionally. Does anyone else struggle with the fact that when...

I came back recently too. It truly is our soft place to land. I've said it before and I'll say it again, you amazing , wise members that ALWAYS know just what to say have made such a huge impact on those of us floundering. I always know where to come. Always.

Much love BG So good to hear from you. I, like so many others think of you often. I cannot imagine what this year has been for you. We are all here, wishing you love and support in any way we can X

And it's the only thing you can do and the best thing you can do for him. It goes against all off our maternal instincts but in the right situation, it's the right thing to do. Well done and keep strong.

My heart hurt for you, sending love, peace and strength x

I think can all probably relate to finding it really difficult to say no. Our DCs have an real talent at pulling on our heart strings. But I have certainly found that the more I say no, the easier it has become. You can prepare a little script and practise it for the next time he calls. Have...

I'm so sorry for your pain. I read a really interesting post on here recently about accepting the fact that our DCs don't choose to live by our moral code and that they are, as adults, entitled to choose the path they walk in life. What they are not entitled to do however is to live in this...

Echo, thank you for such a beautiful honest post. The double edged sword of contact. We want it desperately and dread it in equal measure. I relate completely to the pressure cooker of feelings. I try to feel what I feel but sometimes I distract myself and pretend everything is OK. Nothing...

...the cannabis use with my son. When he reaches out my answer is always stop smoking weed. Your life will get better if you stop putting that c**p into your body. He hates that this is always my answer and would rather not speak to me at all right now. I can't sympathise with any situation...

McDonna, I have being reading your updates for the past few weeks and my heart goes out to you. For me this would now have to be about self preservation. I would block the emails. There is nothing constructive to come from reading such awful, hurtful things. YOU know these things aren't true...

I too love the way this group grounds me when the drama starts again. It has this way of calming my insides and sorting my over thinking head. So sorry that you feel like this. I have the same feelings when my Difficult Child makes contact ( he currently ignores me in the street). He has just made contact...

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. It is so so hard when our children betray us. In this situation I would report him. He has to know that you will not tolerate this. If you let it slide it will be never ending. He must of know that he wasn't going to get away with this. He would...

Love love love this post from recovering enabler ^^^^^ !!!!! Best of luck McDonna x

The double edged sword of contact. I feel so much better when there is no contact ( I hate it that I can say that) My Difficult Child just texted my youngest son and asked me to call him. My stomach instantly hit the floor. I think I'm doing better, and then I know I'm not. Much love to you

A beautiful, inspiring post. Much love to you and your family Tanya x

Thank you RN for your reply. I'm so sorry for your situation. I'm thankful for supportive partners and our other children. You reminded me that it's him that needs to change his behaviour, not me. I needed to be reminded of that. Such a complex situation that I don't see changing anytime...

This would be my partner writing this if I hadn't learnt detachment. Our children will not learn the consequences of their choices if we continuously buffer them from them. This is not a healthy way for anyone to live and I think that by tolerating it you are also playing a part. I hope that...

Hi wonderful people. I'd really appreciate your thoughts... Son and I are back to no contact again. He lives in a bedsit and couple of streets from my house. He instigated contact again in April. He wanted his family back, it was the most important thing to him etc. Within a couple of visits...

...if he wasn't welcome ! My son was making no attempt to make amends or apologise ( this was immediately after the £3500.00 situation) and I was p****d off and justifiably so. This was 2 years ago and we speak if we see each other but I have lost my sister. I could never trust her again...