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Most of us have gone through what you are feeling now. Cycling through different emotions and longing for our kids to just be who we remember when times were good. Please do not minimize the trauma you have been through and compare to other’s experiences. You have had some very scary and...

It’s not that our kids hate us, it’s that they will use our love for them to take advantage of us, if we let them. We are easy targets.

This made me chuckle. At least we can laugh. How true that this experience is a circus. A macabre one at that. “My monkey, not my circus.” As we say in Hawaii “Damn keeds!” How could we not have blood pressure issues? Ugh.

Good Lord KSM, I’m sorry this is happening. I have been there as well with my grands. You have been at this a long time. I don’t blame you for feeling angry. It’s not fair to you or the little one.

Active addiction is a super selfish beast. The drive to get high supersedes everything and everybody. After years of my two coming and going, money, heirloom jewelry, time, stolen, I began to realize that they had dehumanized me as much as I had myself. I was nothing more than an opportunity to...

I am so sorry for your aching Mamas heart. This is a hard road to be on, most of us here on CD have been where you are. You have taken giant steps already to protect the peace in your home. It took a long time for me to start the healing process. Many days I felt as if someone had taken me by...

This is one of the quotes that helped me “Nothing changes, if nothing changes.” Put it on your fridge. It’s not to say that your son will change, but you can. Another quote “What you allow, will continue.” And this “When someone shows you who they are, believe them.” Grief. It is hard stuff...

Hi Newlife, I have also refused phone contact with Tornado when in jail. It was hard, but it was the right decision for my own heath and welfare. Absolutely correct. Are you on Vinelink? It’s a way to keep track of prisoners. I get notifications when Tornado is let out. Stay strong Mama...

Hi Mother 1 and welcome. I am so sorry for your need to be here and for all of the difficult challenges you have faced. It is heartwrenching to watch helplessly as our wayward adult children spin out of control. This is a lot of stress to live with. I know, because I’ve been right where you...

Aloha Seekinghope, I pray this day brings you some peace. I am glad that you and your husband felt reaffirmed in setting healthy boundaries. Whatever the future holds, working together making informed decisions is vital for both of your well being and will strengthen your bond with one another...

Aloha Seekinghope, So sorry for your need to be here but so very glad you found us. You have received some good responses so far. I know personally how difficult it is to have an adult wayward child living far off the normal path and pregnant. It is heart wrenching. I’m sorry you have been...

Hi Newstart, Oh boy, I hope the visit will go smoothly…… So sorry your cruise did not work out. Yup, my father in law was a doozy. The thing was, he was not awful all of the time, but he did some awful things and I knew too much. I was outspoken about his abuse to my mother in law and he...

Hi Dad, Your thoughts and kind response is so appreciated. It has been a challenge with two wayward daughters, that’s for sure. I still get thrown off guard by the reality and the off and on news of them, but it is what it is. I am blessed to have three adult children who are doing well and...

Hi Newlife, Ahhhh birthdays and holidays are hard times to get through for us Moms. How well I know the heartache. I’m sure she knows what day it is. Hopefully she is receiving help. There are routines set up in prison. My daughter ended up the last stint on the work line because it gave her...

QK, I have found looking back when I was deep in the rabbit hole trying to stop the crazy of my daughter’s choices, that I was synchronistically going down along with them. It is akin to a double drowning. The thing is, I was more entrenched in their consequences and horrid choices than they...

Hi QK, So sorry for your need to be here, I am glad you posted, it is good to be able to express the hurt and dismay you are feeling. It is not exactly a conversation to be had over lunch with folks who have not experienced the pain of it. You are not alone. There are many here, including...

Hi Newlife, Special occasions can bring up emotions in us for our wayward adult children. I’m sorry for the sadness that you are feeling. For sure not an outcome that we anticipated while raising our kids. I hope she is receiving the help she needs. As you have posted, your daughter can be...

Hi Dad34, Welcome to the forum, and so sorry for your need to be here. It is good to be able to write out our stories and receive kind responses from parents who are experiencing similar challenges. My two used to play the blame game, it is much easier to shift responsibility for bad choices on...

I’m so sorry Copa. So sorry for the hurt and pain of our reality. It is sad. This is hard Copa. A “damned if you do, damned if you don’t.” Toxic relationships are so damaging. I am still trying to figure out my situation with Tornado. It’s hard not to feel duped and manipulated. She came to...

Hi Healing and welcome back. So sorry for your need to be here. As you may recall my daughter Tornado has been in and out of jail for the last six years primarily for violating her probation. At first, she wanted me to bail her out. No way Jose. I knew with her addiction issues she would think...