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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 755577" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Look New Leaf. You can't take responsibility for Tornado's poor choices. Nothing you have done or ever could do will affect her use of drugs or her choice to stop. She's all alone on that gangplank by herself.</p><p></p><p>Nor do I think it really matters how they misuse our support, that is freely given, from love and hope. Oh. I'm not saying it doesn't hurt us and anger and frustrate us. But in terms of responsibility, there's none. And that they violate our trust (over and over again), has not a thing in the world to do with us. </p><p></p><p>In no way does this mean I condone what they do. What I'm saying is we have no fault here. Because there's no right answer for us, ever. There's a cost to us to every single thing we do or don't do. We might as well do what makes us feel we can live, and not slowly die.</p><p></p><p>We can choose to no longer allow this, by setting ever-stricter boundaries, in order to save ourselves from ongoing pain, but I agree so totally that the only fools here are our children. That they have been reduced to predatory behavior towards the person who loves them best in the world, times 100, is on them. Completely. Totally.</p><p></p><p>We aren't wrong. We weren't wrong. Stopping altogether is not wrong. Showing kindness again, is not wrong.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 755577, member: 18958"] Look New Leaf. You can't take responsibility for Tornado's poor choices. Nothing you have done or ever could do will affect her use of drugs or her choice to stop. She's all alone on that gangplank by herself. Nor do I think it really matters how they misuse our support, that is freely given, from love and hope. Oh. I'm not saying it doesn't hurt us and anger and frustrate us. But in terms of responsibility, there's none. And that they violate our trust (over and over again), has not a thing in the world to do with us. In no way does this mean I condone what they do. What I'm saying is we have no fault here. Because there's no right answer for us, ever. There's a cost to us to every single thing we do or don't do. We might as well do what makes us feel we can live, and not slowly die. We can choose to no longer allow this, by setting ever-stricter boundaries, in order to save ourselves from ongoing pain, but I agree so totally that the only fools here are our children. That they have been reduced to predatory behavior towards the person who loves them best in the world, times 100, is on them. Completely. Totally. We aren't wrong. We weren't wrong. Stopping altogether is not wrong. Showing kindness again, is not wrong. [/QUOTE]
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