Today, I am making a light meal at the church for 50+ people. Then we have a Maundy Thursday service. The meal consists of a soup, various crackers, and a fruit tray. I cooked 10# of chicken breasts in the crockpot yesterday and it is shredded and ready. This morning, I will start chopping onions, celery and cabbage. We call it Russian Chicken Noodle soup as our exchange student from Russia first made it for us 20 years ago. Now it's our congregations favorite soup.
It seems like all the kids have their own plans for this weekend, so I won't be fixing an Easter Lunch, or hiding Easter eggs. The youngest us almost 19...and has plans with her boyfriend and his family that she now lives with. She hinted that since he isn't welcome at our home, but she is at his, it makes holidays difficult.
I told her that maybe in the future I might be ready for the next step, but I'm not right now. She...and he...has made the last 4.5 years of on again, off again relationship too much to welcome him with open arms.
I didn't read my litany of reasons to her, but here they are...
At age 14 he would pressure her to sneak out of our house to be with him. To even run away with him. To get put in juvenile detention because of him. He introduced her to smoking, drinking, weed and meth.
He married another girl two years ago. They have two sons together, and he has a third with another girl. He has no custody or true visitation with any child. The Xgf has her child, the estranged wife's older child is with an Xbf who has her oldest and middle child by husband. The Xbf has court custody of his child with her, and the one that is not his bio child. Then the wife's mom has court custody of the youngest.
He has put his wife in the hospital twice for beating her up, severely. So you can see why I have boundaries...
I guess I should have started this on a different forum. I'm just not willing to forgive and forget. Boundaries. But, I know that my stance will push my adopted granddaughter further away.
Ksm