Crisis after crisis.

[InsaneCdn]

They had some community event planned, and we asked son if he wanted to go. He said nothing and just shook his head. We asked if he wanted us to find him a tutor, so he could re-learn the language, and he said no. When he started high school, we asked if he wanted to go on a trip back there, but again he said no....

Maybe a sign of trauma and difficult memories back there that he doesn't want to face?

 

[susiestar]

Please don't ever feel bad about how much you are posting. We all come to this forum in crisis, and posting helps us get through those difficult times. However much you need to post is the right amount you should post. Period. We are here for each other, to help and nurture each other, to learn from each other and to help each other learn. There are people going through the same things you are who are not able to post for their own reasons. Reading about what you are experiencing and the replies that you get helps those who are only able to lurk right now.

So please, don't worry that we will tell you not to post so much. That is one thing you truly do not have to worry about here!

I am sorry things are so rough right now. (((((hugs)))))

 

[Rina]

Susiestar - Thank you! I do feel guilty for posting too much, though... maybe it'll pass once things here calm down a bit...

InsaneCdn - I've thought of that, but I haven't yet seen any evidence of trauma. The doctors we took him to after the adoption was finalized all said that he didn't show any behavioral signs of trauma. When I asked what does he remember from his birth country, years ago, he said that his birth mother (lived with her from birth to age 4) loved him and took good care of him, and that the orphanage where he spent one year (ages 4-5) was "boring". Don't know what to make of it.

He's still not home. We've decided that if he won't come home sometime during this weekend, we'll contact a private investigator. This uncertainty is killing both of us.

 

[Kathy813]

Hi Rina. I just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you and hope that you have heard from your son.

{{{Hugs}}}

~Kathy

 

[Rina]

Thank you, Kathy. I really appreciate your concern. Son hasn't made contact yet. We have a meeting scheduled with a private investigator later today. I don't know if he'll be able to help, but it feels better than doing nothing. Again, thank you.