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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 756594" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>PLEASE don't be so hard on yourself.</p><p></p><p>You truly are making the best decision for all. Including him.</p><p></p><p>We put up with so much with our son because he too was a minor when he went off the rails. Stealing, lashing out, drug use, bringing druggies in the house, and stealing again cuz yes there was lots etc. etc. you all know the details because you all have dealt with it. We all know that "chapter".</p><p></p><p>I WISH I had known what to do then. I had no idea. I suffered. I did not have little ones or maybe I would have tried something else. I felt stuck. Where could he even go???</p><p></p><p>At 20 we finally sent him away. By that time I honestly was so sick of it all and had done some detachment and I was just so done with him.</p><p></p><p>I let my husband deal with him. I was tethered. He was in Florida for some time at sober living,etc. etc. He came home at 23 after many rehabs, relapses and finally a 13 month faith based program in Memphis, TN.</p><p></p><p>Man it still ain't easy and I mourn the years we have lost together that we will never get back, but such is life. I have had to accept it. We ALL have thorns to bear and among many other thorns, this is one of ours.</p><p></p><p>Please please have self-compassion. Stop feeling guilty. You are not equipped to deal with this in your home. None of us are. We all do our very very best.</p><p></p><p>Your son will grow up. Maybe all of this will stop him from being a lifelong criminal. I thought my son would be many times and that killed me. </p><p></p><p>I think we prevented his death by doing what we did. I really do.</p><p></p><p>If you pray, then pray for him every day and pray for yourself too. Prayer and my faith is what got me through it.</p><p></p><p>Hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 756594, member: 15032"] PLEASE don't be so hard on yourself. You truly are making the best decision for all. Including him. We put up with so much with our son because he too was a minor when he went off the rails. Stealing, lashing out, drug use, bringing druggies in the house, and stealing again cuz yes there was lots etc. etc. you all know the details because you all have dealt with it. We all know that "chapter". I WISH I had known what to do then. I had no idea. I suffered. I did not have little ones or maybe I would have tried something else. I felt stuck. Where could he even go??? At 20 we finally sent him away. By that time I honestly was so sick of it all and had done some detachment and I was just so done with him. I let my husband deal with him. I was tethered. He was in Florida for some time at sober living,etc. etc. He came home at 23 after many rehabs, relapses and finally a 13 month faith based program in Memphis, TN. Man it still ain't easy and I mourn the years we have lost together that we will never get back, but such is life. I have had to accept it. We ALL have thorns to bear and among many other thorns, this is one of ours. Please please have self-compassion. Stop feeling guilty. You are not equipped to deal with this in your home. None of us are. We all do our very very best. Your son will grow up. Maybe all of this will stop him from being a lifelong criminal. I thought my son would be many times and that killed me. I think we prevented his death by doing what we did. I really do. If you pray, then pray for him every day and pray for yourself too. Prayer and my faith is what got me through it. Hugs. [/QUOTE]
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