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difficult child just took a giant step back toward GFGness....
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 373740" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Andy, it does sound to me like he thought he was doing the right thing. He needs to hear this:</p><p></p><p>"Son, I do trust you. But it's me I have to trust in this. I love you all, and was scared I might still hit you because even though you could see you were out of the way, you weren't the ones driving the car, and if I can't see you, any of you, I worry about hurting you."</p><p></p><p>Then put one of his favourite bright-coloured toys right where he was sitting, and get him to sit in the driving seat and see what you couldn't see. And also, you were right to say - "I might have wanted to park on the grass!"</p><p></p><p>They need to see it from their own egocentric point of view. But they also need to see that your annoyance and anxiety is for them, not in spite of them.</p><p></p><p>One annoying possiblility with my above suggestion - he could turn out later on to be a very competent, capable and meticulous driver, able to back the car up without worrying about blind spots. At which point he will say, "I can do it - why can't you?"</p><p>We're currently at the stage where difficult child 3 is learning to drive (in Australia, our kids begin driving lessons at age 16 at the earliest). And the brat has been playing so many driving-related computer games (Grand Theft Auto especially) that he is actually already very skilled. So we try to explain safety concerns such as "be careful when cornering, brake before a corner then accelerate as you come out of the corner," and he's already good at it. Things that still bother us about driving, he's already supremely confident about handling.</p><p></p><p>Oh well... all you can do when this happens is say, "It's all very well for you, but it's not like that for everyone."</p><p></p><p>Andy, it's just one more Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-like feature of your son.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 373740, member: 1991"] Andy, it does sound to me like he thought he was doing the right thing. He needs to hear this: "Son, I do trust you. But it's me I have to trust in this. I love you all, and was scared I might still hit you because even though you could see you were out of the way, you weren't the ones driving the car, and if I can't see you, any of you, I worry about hurting you." Then put one of his favourite bright-coloured toys right where he was sitting, and get him to sit in the driving seat and see what you couldn't see. And also, you were right to say - "I might have wanted to park on the grass!" They need to see it from their own egocentric point of view. But they also need to see that your annoyance and anxiety is for them, not in spite of them. One annoying possiblility with my above suggestion - he could turn out later on to be a very competent, capable and meticulous driver, able to back the car up without worrying about blind spots. At which point he will say, "I can do it - why can't you?" We're currently at the stage where difficult child 3 is learning to drive (in Australia, our kids begin driving lessons at age 16 at the earliest). And the brat has been playing so many driving-related computer games (Grand Theft Auto especially) that he is actually already very skilled. So we try to explain safety concerns such as "be careful when cornering, brake before a corner then accelerate as you come out of the corner," and he's already good at it. Things that still bother us about driving, he's already supremely confident about handling. Oh well... all you can do when this happens is say, "It's all very well for you, but it's not like that for everyone." Andy, it's just one more Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-like feature of your son. Marg [/QUOTE]
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difficult child just took a giant step back toward GFGness....
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