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Parent Emeritus
Does it EVER get better???
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 754521" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>I’m so sorry. How dreadful. I’m glad you are seeing a therapist. Too much stress. I’m glad your ex is working with you cooperatively.</p><p></p><p>I too would be at least a little concerned about possible drug use.</p><p></p><p>Something to consider...if she is going to have free or low cost room and board then she needs to abide by certain rules like:</p><p>See therapist regularly</p><p>No violence</p><p>No drugs</p><p>No illegal behaviors</p><p>No sleep over guests</p><p></p><p>I would start charging her low cost rent if she is not paying already. Find out what rent would be in your area and perhaps charge a little less.</p><p></p><p>And set a date that she will need to leave so that you can sell your house. Maybe a month or two notice e would be reasonable ?</p><p></p><p>I always felt that if I was reasonable or a tad more than reasonable with our daughter and she messed up ....too bad, so sad. I can only do so much.</p><p>What comes after more than reasonable? Nothing.</p><p></p><p>Does it ever get better? Hmmm </p><p>We got some improvement, not a ton, but I’ll take what I can get ...when:</p><p>We moved to a different city</p><p>We set up boundaries</p><p>She got on disability</p><p>We push ourselves to do our best not to be enmeshed and to disassociate/remove ourselves from her craziness as much as possible. </p><p>We push ourselves to explore our own interests and not focus too much in this crxp from our adult children </p><p></p><p>Yes, take care of yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 754521, member: 4152"] I’m so sorry. How dreadful. I’m glad you are seeing a therapist. Too much stress. I’m glad your ex is working with you cooperatively. I too would be at least a little concerned about possible drug use. Something to consider...if she is going to have free or low cost room and board then she needs to abide by certain rules like: See therapist regularly No violence No drugs No illegal behaviors No sleep over guests I would start charging her low cost rent if she is not paying already. Find out what rent would be in your area and perhaps charge a little less. And set a date that she will need to leave so that you can sell your house. Maybe a month or two notice e would be reasonable ? I always felt that if I was reasonable or a tad more than reasonable with our daughter and she messed up ....too bad, so sad. I can only do so much. What comes after more than reasonable? Nothing. Does it ever get better? Hmmm We got some improvement, not a ton, but I’ll take what I can get ...when: We moved to a different city We set up boundaries She got on disability We push ourselves to do our best not to be enmeshed and to disassociate/remove ourselves from her craziness as much as possible. We push ourselves to explore our own interests and not focus too much in this crxp from our adult children Yes, take care of yourself. [/QUOTE]
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Does it EVER get better???
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