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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 732056" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I wouldn't contact him. Jmo but he is trying to sell you something or claim he is close to some sort of expert and ask for money. Something isn't right about this poster. Be careful...please.</p><p></p><p>Meanwhile... Hi and welcome. Have you ever taken your daughter in to maybe get evaluated by a professional? I do think she is rather young to have control of her own money etc. Where is she getting this money that allows her to do whatever she likes when you set a boundary? I don't see it doing her any good. I feel she is way too young to have access to her own bank account and a debit card too! I have four kids and none of them had access to their own money until they turned 18. They would have spent it! Thirteen is way too young to have a clue about money. She is using it to diminish your status as her parents. She still needs to have you be totally in charge of what she can and can't purchase. This, like you said, takes away all your leverage. Although you can take her phone and disconnect the internet. I am not sure why you are giving such a young kid do much power in your home. My kids would have been doing cartwheels over us if they had been given that kind of power but they never had it. They weren't perfect or I wouldn't be here, but they did not have the ability to override us if we set a boundary and took away a privledge.</p><p></p><p>I am going to speak frankly. I hope you don't take this wrong...it is not meant unkindly. It is just my impression of what I read. Your marriage is not helping your girls. You speak in a very disrespectful way about your wife and the girls must know how you feel. There is little you can do without her support. Maybe marriage counseling would help. If you are not on the same page as your wife, and fight in front of the girls, this WILL affect both of them and they may play you against each other. It is hard to be a parent; harder if your marriage is contentious. You sound very unhappy. You, like everyone, deserves happiness. Even if wife won't go for counseling with you maybe it would help you to go yourself. Or at least talk to somebody regularly that you can trust. A Pastor? Dear friend? Trusted family member?</p><p></p><p>To me this sounds like a family problem as well as just this young daughter, although things do need to change regarding her...nothing will change if the house rules stay the same. Or as we say here in a more simple way : Nothing changes if nothing changes.</p><p></p><p>Others will come along.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 732056, member: 1550"] I wouldn't contact him. Jmo but he is trying to sell you something or claim he is close to some sort of expert and ask for money. Something isn't right about this poster. Be careful...please. Meanwhile... Hi and welcome. Have you ever taken your daughter in to maybe get evaluated by a professional? I do think she is rather young to have control of her own money etc. Where is she getting this money that allows her to do whatever she likes when you set a boundary? I don't see it doing her any good. I feel she is way too young to have access to her own bank account and a debit card too! I have four kids and none of them had access to their own money until they turned 18. They would have spent it! Thirteen is way too young to have a clue about money. She is using it to diminish your status as her parents. She still needs to have you be totally in charge of what she can and can't purchase. This, like you said, takes away all your leverage. Although you can take her phone and disconnect the internet. I am not sure why you are giving such a young kid do much power in your home. My kids would have been doing cartwheels over us if they had been given that kind of power but they never had it. They weren't perfect or I wouldn't be here, but they did not have the ability to override us if we set a boundary and took away a privledge. I am going to speak frankly. I hope you don't take this wrong...it is not meant unkindly. It is just my impression of what I read. Your marriage is not helping your girls. You speak in a very disrespectful way about your wife and the girls must know how you feel. There is little you can do without her support. Maybe marriage counseling would help. If you are not on the same page as your wife, and fight in front of the girls, this WILL affect both of them and they may play you against each other. It is hard to be a parent; harder if your marriage is contentious. You sound very unhappy. You, like everyone, deserves happiness. Even if wife won't go for counseling with you maybe it would help you to go yourself. Or at least talk to somebody regularly that you can trust. A Pastor? Dear friend? Trusted family member? To me this sounds like a family problem as well as just this young daughter, although things do need to change regarding her...nothing will change if the house rules stay the same. Or as we say here in a more simple way : Nothing changes if nothing changes. Others will come along. [/QUOTE]
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