Finally at Residential Treatment Facility (RTF)

[Sunlight]

hey there I spoke to Ken yesterday, if you have not seen him, his own daughter had a relapse and is back in.

no matter how educated we become, no matter how hard we stick with the program, we cannot control our kids. it is good and comforting to meet with and speak to others in the same boat. makes you feel not so alone.

 

[ck1]

Janet: That is so true!!! I actually spoke with Ken the day after his daughter relapsed, I was very sad to hear that because it sounded like she was doing better. I also went to the meeting this past Saturday and he was there. Thanks again for sending me the information for that group, they offer a lot of support, espcially Ken!

My difficult child is doing well, as far as I know (no news is good news?). He should be making his weekly call to us tonight, I'm looking forward to talking with him.

LoveMySons: Thanks for your support...I will continue to update and look forward to seeing all of yours as well! Hope you're younger difficult child is feeling a little better now?

StandsWithCourage: You are so right, I really want to give my son something to hold on to and let him know how much I love him and miss him. Unfortunately, my husband sometimes makes that difficult for me...need to find a balance there.

 

[susiestar]

My son was in what the state called a psychiatric hospital, but it was more a Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) than psychiatric hospital. He spent 4 months there when he was 12. I went to see him 2-3 times a week. They wanted both husband & I for family therapy each week, then they also wanted just me for therapy with difficult child. The just me and difficult child therapy was because I knew how to trip his triggers and they couldn't treat what they couldn't see.

I also went up for weekend passes, weekend visits, and some evening visits. If it weren't for this group I would have gone insane.

The ONE big thing that I did that difficult child said helped was make sure that if someone said he would have a visitor then he would have a visitor. We had relatives who would promise to visit then just not go. And husband or I would pack up some music and snacks and get in the car. Rarely were we able to do this together as someone had to watch the younger two, but if whomever promised to visit got sick or had some problem, he got a visitor. He said he learned he could really count on us.

Not sure it really helped later, but time will tell. And even now he knows I will follow through if I tell him something.

Good or bad. I will follow through with him.

Susie

 

[ck1]

Susie: Thanks for the information from your difficult child's point of view, that's really helpful. I will definitely make even more of an effort to communicate with him. I do plan on going to the family sessions and will visit on the weekend (the only time allowed for visits). I just found a babysitter that can stay my two little ones so that I can go to all of the family sessions instead of just participating via phone, husband will come whenever his work schedule allows. I do have people to that can help me, but I'm more comfortable paying someone so I don't feel like I'm inconveniencing anyone. difficult child has started reading a lot since he's been away, so I'm sending him books that interest him.

husband and I talked with difficult child last night and he sounded really good. He still seems to be doing very well. There are a few kids there that are getting on his nerves, but he has to learn to deal with it. I think that will help "push his buttons" so they'll be able to help him with that. We're going to see him next weekend and I'm really looking forward to it!