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From bad to worse...much, much worse.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 656203" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Lil, I agree with Albatross, Echo and Jabber.</p><p></p><p>Your son invites you to wallow in his feelings...the negative private conversations he has in his head...where you have zero control.</p><p></p><p>That is what is making you feel so vulnerable.</p><p>It makes you crazy, as it would anybody.</p><p></p><p>I agree with Jabber that you have got to get some distance and let him have his own successes and his own failures. It is only when HE COMES TO SEE THE PRICE HE PAYS will he have the incentive to change. </p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, no matter how many times we pay the price...it does not help. It is just like we throw ourselves against the rocks, emotionally, over and over again.</p><p></p><p>You know the myth about the sirens and who is it? Ulysses? Ulysses had to ask his crew tie him to the mast, and cover his ears...so that he would not respond to the sirens' call and crash the boat on the rocks. Jabber is your crew, Lil. Listen to him. He does not want you to crash. </p><p></p><p>The way it is structured right now...you are living your son's life...and you are paying the consequences. As long as you do this your son does not have the incentive to change.</p><p></p><p>I say this because, I have done the same. Back off Lil.</p><p></p><p>Believe me, the point here is not Job Corps. It is his growth. If he succeeds at 10 Job Corps, if there is no internal change IN HIM....it means little.</p><p></p><p>There has to be a process whereby your son can live trial and error, without it killing you.</p><p></p><p>You are hanging onto Job Corps like it is YOUR last chance, let alone his. </p><p></p><p>You are not doing your son any favors feeling this desperate.</p><p></p><p>I know. I have been there.</p><p></p><p>Sorry, Lil</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 656203, member: 18958"] Lil, I agree with Albatross, Echo and Jabber. Your son invites you to wallow in his feelings...the negative private conversations he has in his head...where you have zero control. That is what is making you feel so vulnerable. It makes you crazy, as it would anybody. I agree with Jabber that you have got to get some distance and let him have his own successes and his own failures. It is only when HE COMES TO SEE THE PRICE HE PAYS will he have the incentive to change. Unfortunately, no matter how many times we pay the price...it does not help. It is just like we throw ourselves against the rocks, emotionally, over and over again. You know the myth about the sirens and who is it? Ulysses? Ulysses had to ask his crew tie him to the mast, and cover his ears...so that he would not respond to the sirens' call and crash the boat on the rocks. Jabber is your crew, Lil. Listen to him. He does not want you to crash. The way it is structured right now...you are living your son's life...and you are paying the consequences. As long as you do this your son does not have the incentive to change. I say this because, I have done the same. Back off Lil. Believe me, the point here is not Job Corps. It is his growth. If he succeeds at 10 Job Corps, if there is no internal change IN HIM....it means little. There has to be a process whereby your son can live trial and error, without it killing you. You are hanging onto Job Corps like it is YOUR last chance, let alone his. You are not doing your son any favors feeling this desperate. I know. I have been there. Sorry, Lil [/QUOTE]
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