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From bad to worse...much, much worse.
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 656622" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>If you were to advise me Lil, on how to come through the next few months...what would you tell me? How would you encourage me to prepare for an outcome that may be a joyous reaffirmation of everything we had ever wanted for our children and for ourselves too, or that may be an affirmation of some other kind?</p><p></p><p>Which could mean this thing might turn out to be a long-haul sort of situation.</p><p></p><p>"If he fails to complete his community service, Jabber and I will...." "If a warrant is issued, despite having done everything we know to prevent that very thing, Jabber and I will...."</p><p></p><p>We do need to do the best we know for our falling-apart children. When they are young, so much ~ everything ~ can still be recovered. They can still commit to their educations. They can still go on to reclaim themselves and their lives.</p><p></p><p>So, we have to do what we do.</p><p></p><p>That is just the truth of the thing. For me, it is.</p><p></p><p>You see how that worked out, for us.</p><p></p><p>I sound like I am pretending to know everything. That is the nice thing about this site. I can pretend to know every. single. thing.</p><p></p><p>Nowhere else in my life is that possible.</p><p></p><p>You believe this?!?</p><p></p><p>Grrr....</p><p></p><p>***</p><p></p><p>Back when everything was still just falling apart and believe it or not, I was still in denial about that very thing (and where I was to remain, pretty firmly ensconced, until my kids hit their thirties ~ okay, okay ~ almost their forties), my D H insisted that he and I sit together, all alone in our house at 5:30 every single day. No phone. No television. No kids was not a necessary rule at that time because I could not keep either of my children at home for love nor money.</p><p></p><p>They wanted money while they lived wherever they wanted.</p><p></p><p>Nevermind about where they got a crazy idea like that, Cedar hisses.</p><p></p><p>Darn that D H.</p><p></p><p>:O)</p><p></p><p>We had a Manhattan. Olives, not cherries.</p><p></p><p>I could play music.</p><p></p><p>We will have to begin that again, because it turned out that between D H insistence and my ambiance thing, those hours became precious, anticipated, and probably saved our marriage.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, I chose Dean Martin. Something a little corny, a little cool ~ and D H is Italian, after all.</p><p></p><p>And that is what we did, and that is how our marriage survived everything that came next, good and bad.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 656622, member: 17461"] If you were to advise me Lil, on how to come through the next few months...what would you tell me? How would you encourage me to prepare for an outcome that may be a joyous reaffirmation of everything we had ever wanted for our children and for ourselves too, or that may be an affirmation of some other kind? Which could mean this thing might turn out to be a long-haul sort of situation. "If he fails to complete his community service, Jabber and I will...." "If a warrant is issued, despite having done everything we know to prevent that very thing, Jabber and I will...." We do need to do the best we know for our falling-apart children. When they are young, so much ~ everything ~ can still be recovered. They can still commit to their educations. They can still go on to reclaim themselves and their lives. So, we have to do what we do. That is just the truth of the thing. For me, it is. You see how that worked out, for us. I sound like I am pretending to know everything. That is the nice thing about this site. I can pretend to know every. single. thing. Nowhere else in my life is that possible. You believe this?!? Grrr.... *** Back when everything was still just falling apart and believe it or not, I was still in denial about that very thing (and where I was to remain, pretty firmly ensconced, until my kids hit their thirties ~ okay, okay ~ almost their forties), my D H insisted that he and I sit together, all alone in our house at 5:30 every single day. No phone. No television. No kids was not a necessary rule at that time because I could not keep either of my children at home for love nor money. They wanted money while they lived wherever they wanted. Nevermind about where they got a crazy idea like that, Cedar hisses. Darn that D H. :O) We had a Manhattan. Olives, not cherries. I could play music. We will have to begin that again, because it turned out that between D H insistence and my ambiance thing, those hours became precious, anticipated, and probably saved our marriage. Anyway, I chose Dean Martin. Something a little corny, a little cool ~ and D H is Italian, after all. And that is what we did, and that is how our marriage survived everything that came next, good and bad. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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