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Getting through Mother's Day
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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 733733" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>I am sorry for your heartache over your sons.</p><p>I don’t hear from my two daughters and don’t expect to on special occasions.</p><p>They are too wrapped up in their own lifestyles out there somewhere finding their way. When I stopped enabling them, they stopped contacting me. That says a lot. Their street friends who they party with are more important than family.</p><p>I don’t want my heart torn and manipulated. I won’t fund their drug use, or entertain their blaming me for their choices.</p><p>It has been years on this “hell” go round and I am not getting any younger. I don’t want to focus on what my off the rails two are doing anymore. So, I gave them over to God, and ask Him to watch over them.</p><p>With this, I have hope they will find their potential. But, I don’t have expectations for cards or calls, or anything. That just leads to disappointment.</p><p>I have had to train myself to switch focus. Instead of longing for days gone by, I am thankful for the wonderful times we had as a family.</p><p>It is a grieving we go through when our kids grow up and travel down roads we never imagined. In grief, time can speed up and can also be <em>agonizingly</em> slow, especially when holidays come round and all of what is supposed to be, isn’t. It just churns up those memories and unanswerable questions.</p><p></p><p>Time can also heal those wounds, but we do have to work at processing the feelings.</p><p></p><p>I am at the point where I look at the good times with a bittersweet gratitude for the blessings of raising my two, and hope that those memories will spark a desire to choose better for themselves.</p><p>I would give all the special occasions, calls and cards for them <em>just to be well.</em></p><p>That is not up to me.</p><p>So, I try to focus on <em>what is up to me,</em> and that is how I live my life.</p><p>On this Mother’s Day and other special occasions, I wish for peace of heart and mind. </p><p>I wish for all mothers in our situation to know that we have done the best job we could in raising our children, those memories and values are within them, too. </p><p>No matter how distant they are, the good times we remember are still there for <em>them too.</em></p><p>(((HUGS)))</p><p>Leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 733733, member: 19522"] I am sorry for your heartache over your sons. I don’t hear from my two daughters and don’t expect to on special occasions. They are too wrapped up in their own lifestyles out there somewhere finding their way. When I stopped enabling them, they stopped contacting me. That says a lot. Their street friends who they party with are more important than family. I don’t want my heart torn and manipulated. I won’t fund their drug use, or entertain their blaming me for their choices. It has been years on this “hell” go round and I am not getting any younger. I don’t want to focus on what my off the rails two are doing anymore. So, I gave them over to God, and ask Him to watch over them. With this, I have hope they will find their potential. But, I don’t have expectations for cards or calls, or anything. That just leads to disappointment. I have had to train myself to switch focus. Instead of longing for days gone by, I am thankful for the wonderful times we had as a family. It is a grieving we go through when our kids grow up and travel down roads we never imagined. In grief, time can speed up and can also be [I]agonizingly[/I] slow, especially when holidays come round and all of what is supposed to be, isn’t. It just churns up those memories and unanswerable questions. Time can also heal those wounds, but we do have to work at processing the feelings. I am at the point where I look at the good times with a bittersweet gratitude for the blessings of raising my two, and hope that those memories will spark a desire to choose better for themselves. I would give all the special occasions, calls and cards for them [I]just to be well.[/I] That is not up to me. So, I try to focus on [I]what is up to me,[/I] and that is how I live my life. On this Mother’s Day and other special occasions, I wish for peace of heart and mind. I wish for all mothers in our situation to know that we have done the best job we could in raising our children, those memories and values are within them, too. No matter how distant they are, the good times we remember are still there for [I]them too.[/I] (((HUGS))) Leafy [/QUOTE]
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