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General Parenting
Heartbroken seeking support and advice
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 764717" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Your story is exemplary.</p><p></p><p>You don't say it upfront, but you feel guilt, it seems. Why? </p><p></p><p>It's time for your son to live independently. I would very much suggest that this not be a break but a transition to his being responsible for himself so that he lives in such a way that he can live as he wants, and so the consequences of his choices accrue to him, not to you.</p><p></p><p>I agree with Nomad. You are only stuck with him as long as you choose. He has had enough to launch for a long time. A car, military benefits, a trade, etc.</p><p></p><p>It is you who has to change, not him. You don't have to tolerate him. You don't have to support him. You don't have to buy him expensive things like a car or anything else. Your son will not change vis-a-vis you until you change. The ball is in your court.</p><p></p><p>Welcome to the forum.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 764717, member: 18958"] Your story is exemplary. You don't say it upfront, but you feel guilt, it seems. Why? It's time for your son to live independently. I would very much suggest that this not be a break but a transition to his being responsible for himself so that he lives in such a way that he can live as he wants, and so the consequences of his choices accrue to him, not to you. I agree with Nomad. You are only stuck with him as long as you choose. He has had enough to launch for a long time. A car, military benefits, a trade, etc. It is you who has to change, not him. You don't have to tolerate him. You don't have to support him. You don't have to buy him expensive things like a car or anything else. Your son will not change vis-a-vis you until you change. The ball is in your court. Welcome to the forum. [/QUOTE]
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