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Help with my 13 year old step daughter.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 723435" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Two guesses, and I havent even read the ehole thing, but I am very familiar with children who have been damaged in utero by a motjers drug use while pregnant and abused early in life too. We adopted and did foster care and N acts exactly as if she were abused as a young infant/toddler (mom or otjer men friends maybe?) And Mom probably drank and dix drugs ehile pregnant before being put in a halfway house. It is dangerous to even have one drinking binge in the earliest stages of pregnancy. This can lead to brain damage referred to as fetal alcohol affects, and it is irreversible and the petson is never able to be normal.</p><p></p><p>Tje sexual overtones are really scary and although her conscious mind may havr forgotten it, my best guess is tjat sometime, in Moms care, she was sexually abused and is acting on it. Or she saw Mom having sex snd is mimicking what she saw. Never ever leave her alone with your baby. Not even if you have to take Baby in bathroom with you or slerp with him.</p><p></p><p>Rehome your pets. It is not fair she hurts them. Sheay kill them. See, we adopted an 11 year old boy who had a tough early life, his birthmom did drugs and drank, and somewhere before he met us he was sexually abused. And he had no conscience due to his early years. What behaviors dod he have?</p><p></p><p>1. He hurt our pets and finally killed two.</p><p></p><p>2. He molested our babies and they were too afraid of him to tell us because he threatened to kill us all if they told. Said he would set the house on fire. He would strile matches and set little fires...again my 3 and 5 year old were too afraid to tell on him.</p><p></p><p>3. He lied like he breathed.</p><p></p><p>4. He acted like a little angrl toward adults so nobpdy knew what wad going on until he killed pur dog. That was the point when we realized our "good" little boy...the one who smiled at us snd said he loved us...was a child sociopath. That day a friend of ours got him to dpill it all, we called CPS to take him and it turned out that my babies neededtherspy for years and that this boy had been slowly trying to destroy the babies for three years and we hadnt known.</p><p></p><p>We are strong. We came thrpugh. The bsbies are now strong adults. We never wanted the boy to come back. Je clearly could npt be safe in a family with kids snd pets.</p><p></p><p>Do I thonk N is like him, fooling even doctors? She could be. She sounds dangerous. So I repeat: never let her near that baby again unless you are close enough to grab her, and rehpme your precious pets or they could suddrnly die. Our boy killed twopets. The first time we thought it had tp be a sick neighbor becsuse Boy always acted as if he loved our dogs....around us. We felt guilty and stupid when we found out the whole thing.</p><p></p><p>Dont be us.</p><p></p><p>Since N is your husbands daughter he may be unwilling tp see her behavior as potentially dangerous. I hope he does see. Yhos kid is acting like our boy, a child psychpath. Hurting animals is extremely sick and unusual and her sexual acting out and undertones are red flags. N is not right, but most professionals, even counsrlors, miss alcohol affects and antisocial behavior in kids caused by early trauma. We lived it. So glad its over. So glad we survived.</p><p></p><p>I do not think N is safe. I hope you can convince your husband to never leave N alone for a second with youngest...ever.... and I hope you both agree to rehome the pets or else never ever alloe her slone eith them either. This is so hard, which os why I said to rehome tje pets before there is an "accident "</p><p></p><p>Your story screamed to me. This is so abnormal and scary. Is husband worried??? This is not innocent kid stuff.</p><p></p><p>Hugs and love! Ok, I just finished reading your whole story. Keep her with Mom. She is not going to get better at home. There is nothing you can do other yhsn put her into 24/7 residrential treatment, hope it hrlps her, and be safe...dont let her visit. I read that you have a farm and many animals. NEVER CAN SHE LIVE WITH YOU. SHE MAY NOT JUST KILL THE PETS BUT WHAT SHE DID TO YOUR HAIR IS APPALLING AND SCARY.</p><p></p><p>She needs mental healthcare in a facility that can alwsys watch her. If you cant do that, at least let her stay with Mom. Your house is too wrong for her...a baby and animals. She cant be there</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 723435, member: 1550"] Two guesses, and I havent even read the ehole thing, but I am very familiar with children who have been damaged in utero by a motjers drug use while pregnant and abused early in life too. We adopted and did foster care and N acts exactly as if she were abused as a young infant/toddler (mom or otjer men friends maybe?) And Mom probably drank and dix drugs ehile pregnant before being put in a halfway house. It is dangerous to even have one drinking binge in the earliest stages of pregnancy. This can lead to brain damage referred to as fetal alcohol affects, and it is irreversible and the petson is never able to be normal. Tje sexual overtones are really scary and although her conscious mind may havr forgotten it, my best guess is tjat sometime, in Moms care, she was sexually abused and is acting on it. Or she saw Mom having sex snd is mimicking what she saw. Never ever leave her alone with your baby. Not even if you have to take Baby in bathroom with you or slerp with him. Rehome your pets. It is not fair she hurts them. Sheay kill them. See, we adopted an 11 year old boy who had a tough early life, his birthmom did drugs and drank, and somewhere before he met us he was sexually abused. And he had no conscience due to his early years. What behaviors dod he have? 1. He hurt our pets and finally killed two. 2. He molested our babies and they were too afraid of him to tell us because he threatened to kill us all if they told. Said he would set the house on fire. He would strile matches and set little fires...again my 3 and 5 year old were too afraid to tell on him. 3. He lied like he breathed. 4. He acted like a little angrl toward adults so nobpdy knew what wad going on until he killed pur dog. That was the point when we realized our "good" little boy...the one who smiled at us snd said he loved us...was a child sociopath. That day a friend of ours got him to dpill it all, we called CPS to take him and it turned out that my babies neededtherspy for years and that this boy had been slowly trying to destroy the babies for three years and we hadnt known. We are strong. We came thrpugh. The bsbies are now strong adults. We never wanted the boy to come back. Je clearly could npt be safe in a family with kids snd pets. Do I thonk N is like him, fooling even doctors? She could be. She sounds dangerous. So I repeat: never let her near that baby again unless you are close enough to grab her, and rehpme your precious pets or they could suddrnly die. Our boy killed twopets. The first time we thought it had tp be a sick neighbor becsuse Boy always acted as if he loved our dogs....around us. We felt guilty and stupid when we found out the whole thing. Dont be us. Since N is your husbands daughter he may be unwilling tp see her behavior as potentially dangerous. I hope he does see. Yhos kid is acting like our boy, a child psychpath. Hurting animals is extremely sick and unusual and her sexual acting out and undertones are red flags. N is not right, but most professionals, even counsrlors, miss alcohol affects and antisocial behavior in kids caused by early trauma. We lived it. So glad its over. So glad we survived. I do not think N is safe. I hope you can convince your husband to never leave N alone for a second with youngest...ever.... and I hope you both agree to rehome the pets or else never ever alloe her slone eith them either. This is so hard, which os why I said to rehome tje pets before there is an "accident " Your story screamed to me. This is so abnormal and scary. Is husband worried??? This is not innocent kid stuff. Hugs and love! Ok, I just finished reading your whole story. Keep her with Mom. She is not going to get better at home. There is nothing you can do other yhsn put her into 24/7 residrential treatment, hope it hrlps her, and be safe...dont let her visit. I read that you have a farm and many animals. NEVER CAN SHE LIVE WITH YOU. SHE MAY NOT JUST KILL THE PETS BUT WHAT SHE DID TO YOUR HAIR IS APPALLING AND SCARY. She needs mental healthcare in a facility that can alwsys watch her. If you cant do that, at least let her stay with Mom. Your house is too wrong for her...a baby and animals. She cant be there [/QUOTE]
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