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Hurt and frustrated
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 751641" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>Oh, dear Copa, yes I have other kids so it is different. I do not know if I could let go of Kay if I did not. I had trouble letting go as things are.</p><p></p><p>But please do not misunderstand me. Even though I have other kids, I always have pictures in my mind of Kay sitting there with us, laughing over coffee, talking, doing mom/daughter things with me like shopping and most of all doing things with Jaden. I can say pretty words, but my heart is still broken. She was my first and only for many years. She is my musical one, my beautiful one, my child who can speak in front if a crowd with no fear. I can't do that, even though I must for work. Kay is my Indigo child. God gave her to me. I will always wish she could be with us. I feel worse in a way than when our child passed away because Kay is still here. But she isn't.</p><p></p><p>I don't mean to say that it is just as hard for me. I don't think it is. </p><p></p><p>But my heart still cries and, like you, I wonder about Kay after I am gone. I picture her locked up somewhere, and not in jail. I know Jaden has good people who would take him in with loving hearts so that is a lot off my mind. But I also know that Kay could end up alone, maybe locked up for her mental illness or wandering the streets, Lee having run off. Or her AND Lee could end up homeless together, getting high in Colorado. Or in CA living in a car. </p><p></p><p>It is a very uncomfortable possibility.</p><p></p><p>My husband snd I will be consulting with our attorney regarding Kay. I don't nthink anyone who adores a troubled child ever feels completely off the hook.</p><p></p><p>God bless.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 751641, member: 23706"] Oh, dear Copa, yes I have other kids so it is different. I do not know if I could let go of Kay if I did not. I had trouble letting go as things are. But please do not misunderstand me. Even though I have other kids, I always have pictures in my mind of Kay sitting there with us, laughing over coffee, talking, doing mom/daughter things with me like shopping and most of all doing things with Jaden. I can say pretty words, but my heart is still broken. She was my first and only for many years. She is my musical one, my beautiful one, my child who can speak in front if a crowd with no fear. I can't do that, even though I must for work. Kay is my Indigo child. God gave her to me. I will always wish she could be with us. I feel worse in a way than when our child passed away because Kay is still here. But she isn't. I don't mean to say that it is just as hard for me. I don't think it is. But my heart still cries and, like you, I wonder about Kay after I am gone. I picture her locked up somewhere, and not in jail. I know Jaden has good people who would take him in with loving hearts so that is a lot off my mind. But I also know that Kay could end up alone, maybe locked up for her mental illness or wandering the streets, Lee having run off. Or her AND Lee could end up homeless together, getting high in Colorado. Or in CA living in a car. It is a very uncomfortable possibility. My husband snd I will be consulting with our attorney regarding Kay. I don't nthink anyone who adores a troubled child ever feels completely off the hook. God bless. [/QUOTE]
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