So as many of you know I'm working on not enabling my 30 & 26 yr. olds. I've stopped the gas ups as of a month ago with lots of back lash in particular from older son. Verbal and physical threats from older son. I still pay for student loans, storage unit, gym membership fee and cell phone but hand outs for cash & gas and food, no longer. It just hurts me that today he sent an e-mail as follows: "For real though you better not f*&%)*#@ open your mouth or ever come near me again. And I can't afford to pay for my phone bill in time before I get paid. So I know you are a shallow piece of human feces but please pay for it his next month. Not that I can count on You for anything you giant herpe. Kill yourself ignorant woman." Who says "please" in a sentence like that? I had planned on paying his cell phone minutes because I just renew them on line. I know he just started working and as many of the other mothers do (from what I've read) paying the cell phone allows me some level of comfort. I also, felt like he has more connection with work schedules etc. However, I'm feeling like I just got punched in the stomach or heart. I will have to think long and hard about this because I feel like I'll be rewarding him with phone minutes and still allowing him to speak to me this way. Also, I tried last night to text younger son. Just to explain to him that I don't want to be estranged from him but he does nothing to better his situation and I cannot/will no longer give out money. I explained in every conversation it's just too difficult for me because he does not accept No for an answer. It didn't go well. Basically he says me and his father have abandoned him. He is 26 and I could have replied with the usual that he's not a baby or 18 yrs. old. etc. where one would consider that abandonment. But instead I just blocked him again. I was trying to set some boundaries so I could still keep in touch with him but it didn't work.