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Parent Emeritus
I am sad and desperate and hopeless again
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 745503" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Of course you are scared. Who wouldnt be? And you did e erything for J that was done for my son so you did ALL anyone could have.</p><p></p><p>My mom was big on cliques and they are in my head. "You can lead a horse to water but you cant make him drink."</p><p></p><p>You are still helping him by telling him his options. That is all you can do because you cant make him utilize them. I would also be a wreck!</p><p></p><p>Have you spoken to your wise Rabbi friend lately? She seems very kind and smart and may help you come to one decision. It is so easy for us to help others, but not as easy to help ourselves. Thats where a trusted third party with no skin in the game can help us.</p><p></p><p>If you miss M, he is an i.portant issue too. I dont think we should give up our partners for adult kids. We need love, companionship and comfort too. You need what we all need. Is M perfect? Nobody is. Do you love him and feel comfort with him? Only you can answer if it is worth losing him since J is no more cooperative with M not there.</p><p></p><p>Sit. Relax. Take times to just be chill and not think about it at all. You dont have to do anything today or tomorrow. This has been ongoing. A few days wont whange anyrhing.</p><p></p><p>Love, hugs and delicuous, aromic hot coffee!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 745503, member: 1550"] Of course you are scared. Who wouldnt be? And you did e erything for J that was done for my son so you did ALL anyone could have. My mom was big on cliques and they are in my head. "You can lead a horse to water but you cant make him drink." You are still helping him by telling him his options. That is all you can do because you cant make him utilize them. I would also be a wreck! Have you spoken to your wise Rabbi friend lately? She seems very kind and smart and may help you come to one decision. It is so easy for us to help others, but not as easy to help ourselves. Thats where a trusted third party with no skin in the game can help us. If you miss M, he is an i.portant issue too. I dont think we should give up our partners for adult kids. We need love, companionship and comfort too. You need what we all need. Is M perfect? Nobody is. Do you love him and feel comfort with him? Only you can answer if it is worth losing him since J is no more cooperative with M not there. Sit. Relax. Take times to just be chill and not think about it at all. You dont have to do anything today or tomorrow. This has been ongoing. A few days wont whange anyrhing. Love, hugs and delicuous, aromic hot coffee! [/QUOTE]
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I am sad and desperate and hopeless again
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