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<blockquote data-quote="YogiLori" data-source="post: 762740" data-attributes="member: 30044"><p>Thank you, I am buying that book today. My son called my husband to ask him about a job application. He had questions about some things. This made me happy. My husband and I are going to see my therapist tomorrow to talk all this out. My husband and I decided nope, he cannot live here anymore. We had made so many rules, and tried many many times and it is just not going to work. And I have to be proud of myself because I read the text that I sent to him a two weeks ago about him moving back and us saying okay for 2 weeks but then realizing he was going to be here for an unlimited amount of time and I said NO. My son and I went back and forth for many texts and I simply explained, we love him, can help him move, and even give him furniture, but moving back, even for a short time, is moving backwards. I also mentioned that he does not reciprocate our goodness and it is too hard to live with him. He replied that I was too sensitive (which yes I am the most highly sensitive person I know!!!) and I am giving my responsibilities to someone else. I told him his comments hurt my feelings but NO he is an adult and can live wherever he wants. So I have been ANXIOUS since this conversation because of course I want love.........BUT I didn't back down and this is a win for me. Also, I didn't text or call him to see how he was doing......another win for me. I am breaking my bad patterns BUT IT IS KILLING ME. my son called my husband for help, not me - which is unusual cause my husband does not take the crap I do. So he plays us off depending on what he wants or who he last had a negative interaction with..He cannot live here and I know he will not stay long at his grandma's cause she does not run the A/C its 100 here and she has no wifi. She is completely old school (her house is filthy too) It will be interesting if he does choose to go there and also interesting if he gets a job anytime soon. I am getting two of those books however for me and my mother in law. THANK YOU!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="YogiLori, post: 762740, member: 30044"] Thank you, I am buying that book today. My son called my husband to ask him about a job application. He had questions about some things. This made me happy. My husband and I are going to see my therapist tomorrow to talk all this out. My husband and I decided nope, he cannot live here anymore. We had made so many rules, and tried many many times and it is just not going to work. And I have to be proud of myself because I read the text that I sent to him a two weeks ago about him moving back and us saying okay for 2 weeks but then realizing he was going to be here for an unlimited amount of time and I said NO. My son and I went back and forth for many texts and I simply explained, we love him, can help him move, and even give him furniture, but moving back, even for a short time, is moving backwards. I also mentioned that he does not reciprocate our goodness and it is too hard to live with him. He replied that I was too sensitive (which yes I am the most highly sensitive person I know!!!) and I am giving my responsibilities to someone else. I told him his comments hurt my feelings but NO he is an adult and can live wherever he wants. So I have been ANXIOUS since this conversation because of course I want love.........BUT I didn't back down and this is a win for me. Also, I didn't text or call him to see how he was doing......another win for me. I am breaking my bad patterns BUT IT IS KILLING ME. my son called my husband for help, not me - which is unusual cause my husband does not take the crap I do. So he plays us off depending on what he wants or who he last had a negative interaction with..He cannot live here and I know he will not stay long at his grandma's cause she does not run the A/C its 100 here and she has no wifi. She is completely old school (her house is filthy too) It will be interesting if he does choose to go there and also interesting if he gets a job anytime soon. I am getting two of those books however for me and my mother in law. THANK YOU!! [/QUOTE]
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