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Parent Emeritus
Into the garbage pit.
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<blockquote data-quote="JMom" data-source="post: 758286" data-attributes="member: 19892"><p>Newstart,</p><p></p><p>I'm with Copa-there is a lot of love floating around. You help people because it is who YOU are. I too, am an empath. Hurt is part of the nature of you. She is your daughter, that is WHY you help her. You love her, that is WHY you put up with it. So he's a sleeze but she's getting something from the relationship or she wouldn't allow it. I'm not saying it's a healthy return, but it is her choice to make.</p><p></p><p>She is also choosing YOU. She loves you. I think detaching with love is a great idea, I agree with you 100%. You can still love her every bit as much without the extra responsibilities (cleaning up their messes). Is it possible to spend time with her in a neutral location-away from her mess, her boyfriend and his shoes? Perhaps, for your sake, the subject of him is off limits. I hope you can take a step back and see that you can not control her choice to be with him. What you CAN control is how deep you dive in to cleaning up the mess (physically and spiritually). You have a very strong moral compass and a close relationship to your spiritual guide, maybe you could focus on turning it over to God. What would you have done differently, if you knew the final outcome? Do that. Do things for you. Be kind to you. You deserve kindness-a friend who is just as sweet, nurturing and as giving as you are. Find peace today. Put that anger aside-it will be waiting for you tomorrow.</p><p></p><p>Love,</p><p>JMOM</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JMom, post: 758286, member: 19892"] Newstart, I'm with Copa-there is a lot of love floating around. You help people because it is who YOU are. I too, am an empath. Hurt is part of the nature of you. She is your daughter, that is WHY you help her. You love her, that is WHY you put up with it. So he's a sleeze but she's getting something from the relationship or she wouldn't allow it. I'm not saying it's a healthy return, but it is her choice to make. She is also choosing YOU. She loves you. I think detaching with love is a great idea, I agree with you 100%. You can still love her every bit as much without the extra responsibilities (cleaning up their messes). Is it possible to spend time with her in a neutral location-away from her mess, her boyfriend and his shoes? Perhaps, for your sake, the subject of him is off limits. I hope you can take a step back and see that you can not control her choice to be with him. What you CAN control is how deep you dive in to cleaning up the mess (physically and spiritually). You have a very strong moral compass and a close relationship to your spiritual guide, maybe you could focus on turning it over to God. What would you have done differently, if you knew the final outcome? Do that. Do things for you. Be kind to you. You deserve kindness-a friend who is just as sweet, nurturing and as giving as you are. Find peace today. Put that anger aside-it will be waiting for you tomorrow. Love, JMOM [/QUOTE]
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