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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 685044" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>I do think you are overreacting...just a little. The tantrum...well, we definitely didn't get off on the right foot, but if it doesn't happen again? I'm inclined to overlook it. Our mistake was not sitting him down and, before he ever came over, telling him "this is how it will be". Obviously, it should go without saying, but what does with him? He's failed to do dishes one time. But he was also in bed before us and it is entirely possible that he actually was unwell given that fact. If he doesn't do them today...different story. A little bit of an adjustment period is to be expected. He hasn't smoked in the house or we'd smell it. Drugs? Well I assume we'd smell it, but there is simply the fact that we don't KNOW. We aren't home. We can't know what's going on when we're not there. That was a problem before too.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>And this is MY biggest problem. I understand it completely, but I'm not only constantly on edge waiting for him to blow - bad enough, but I'm on edge waiting for you to!</p><p></p><p>At this point I don't believe he'll steal from us again. Last time we kicked him out and it was 18 months and a fire before we let him back. He does it again he'll lose any support from us, if we don't flat out call the cops, which I think he actually realizes we'll do. I don't think you need to be on "high alert". If you must, come home, check the guitars, guns and bows and then put it behind you for the night! He isn't the only one that needs to let things go Honey.</p><p></p><p>The sitting around our house constantly on edge as to whether he's going to get upset by someone on his phone or jumping when he's in the kitchen, wondering if he's making a drink (which he hasn't but the one time), or trying NOT to nag about the job thing...that's all bad enough.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 685044, member: 17309"] I do think you are overreacting...just a little. The tantrum...well, we definitely didn't get off on the right foot, but if it doesn't happen again? I'm inclined to overlook it. Our mistake was not sitting him down and, before he ever came over, telling him "this is how it will be". Obviously, it should go without saying, but what does with him? He's failed to do dishes one time. But he was also in bed before us and it is entirely possible that he actually was unwell given that fact. If he doesn't do them today...different story. A little bit of an adjustment period is to be expected. He hasn't smoked in the house or we'd smell it. Drugs? Well I assume we'd smell it, but there is simply the fact that we don't KNOW. We aren't home. We can't know what's going on when we're not there. That was a problem before too. And this is MY biggest problem. I understand it completely, but I'm not only constantly on edge waiting for him to blow - bad enough, but I'm on edge waiting for you to! At this point I don't believe he'll steal from us again. Last time we kicked him out and it was 18 months and a fire before we let him back. He does it again he'll lose any support from us, if we don't flat out call the cops, which I think he actually realizes we'll do. I don't think you need to be on "high alert". If you must, come home, check the guitars, guns and bows and then put it behind you for the night! He isn't the only one that needs to let things go Honey. The sitting around our house constantly on edge as to whether he's going to get upset by someone on his phone or jumping when he's in the kitchen, wondering if he's making a drink (which he hasn't but the one time), or trying NOT to nag about the job thing...that's all bad enough. [/QUOTE]
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