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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 685083" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Well Jabber and our son have always butted heads. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /> He's a great dad, but much more disciplined that I am. I always tended to go by, "say yes when you can, say no when you must", whereas his response to our son was usually "No"...as a default. So what our son does seems to bother him much more than it does me. Always has.</p><p></p><p>Jabber and I have talked and we agree we do have to sit him down and tell him, that for his own peace of mind as well as ours, that we have no intention of putting him out until his new apartment is ready, unless he does something to make that happen - by breaking the very simple rules. BUT, we expect him to be ready to move when the apartment is open. He WILL be moving out then. That means he'll need to have a job and have any rental assistance he can find lined up. He really should talk to the landlord again before she goes on vacation, and make sure the new apartment is lined up.</p><p></p><p>So everyone, <strong><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0)">this is the real question</span></span></strong>:</p><p></p><p>How do we make him understand that we're <strong>not</strong> telling him this because we want to make him freak out. We want the opposite, but I can see him panicking, because, <em>"I only have three or four weeks and then I'll be homeless again because you'll kick me out!" </em> That's exactly what I expect him to say or think.</p><p></p><p>The intent on our part is for him to say, <em>"I have 3 to 4 weeks, so I better get moving so I'm ready."</em></p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, it's more likely that our son's attitude will be, <em>"I can't find work and be ready in 3 to 4 weeks, so I may as well not even try."</em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 685083, member: 17309"] Well Jabber and our son have always butted heads. :( He's a great dad, but much more disciplined that I am. I always tended to go by, "say yes when you can, say no when you must", whereas his response to our son was usually "No"...as a default. So what our son does seems to bother him much more than it does me. Always has. Jabber and I have talked and we agree we do have to sit him down and tell him, that for his own peace of mind as well as ours, that we have no intention of putting him out until his new apartment is ready, unless he does something to make that happen - by breaking the very simple rules. BUT, we expect him to be ready to move when the apartment is open. He WILL be moving out then. That means he'll need to have a job and have any rental assistance he can find lined up. He really should talk to the landlord again before she goes on vacation, and make sure the new apartment is lined up. So everyone, [B][SIZE=4][COLOR=rgb(255, 0, 0)]this is the real question[/COLOR][/SIZE][/B]: How do we make him understand that we're [B]not[/B] telling him this because we want to make him freak out. We want the opposite, but I can see him panicking, because, [I]"I only have three or four weeks and then I'll be homeless again because you'll kick me out!" [/I] That's exactly what I expect him to say or think. The intent on our part is for him to say, [I]"I have 3 to 4 weeks, so I better get moving so I'm ready."[/I] Unfortunately, it's more likely that our son's attitude will be, [I]"I can't find work and be ready in 3 to 4 weeks, so I may as well not even try."[/I] [/QUOTE]
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