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<blockquote data-quote="skittles" data-source="post: 755303" data-attributes="member: 2484"><p>She is on assisstance, the waiting list for housing is long and priority goes to emergency situations. If she goes to a shelter she will be on the list, however we have Childrens Aid Society involved (we are in canada , CAS is the same as CPS in the US) so CAS would likely step in and place them in foster care if they were in a shelter . if they place the children , i’m not sure if she would still get priority over someone whose children have not been placed. It’s once they get in Foster care it seems very difficult to get them out.Regardless the list is so long for placement and she was in subsidized housing before, but as I said she’s very unrealistic and she decided she didn’t want to live in the “ghetto”, so she screwed up that opportunity as well. moved out with no notice didn’t pay last months rent etc. . i’m not sure if they’ll put her on the list again. it is heartbreaking because for the longest time I thought the kids were better with her rather than foster care or my son even though she moved a lot she was doing not too bad but things really fell apart when this new guy moved in. he causes problems with everyone, he threatened me at one point and I called the children’s aid, apparently the principal at the kids school called the police on him because he threaten the principal, and he beat up one of my daughter-in-law‘s old boyfriends in the driveway. he had let a friend leave a stolen car in the driveway, when the police came because he had threatened the principal they found the stolen car, He wouldn’t allow my daughter-in-law to say who left the car there as that would be ‘ratting’on his friend, so she was charged with with possession of stolen property. Financially she never seems to have enough money for anything anymore but he always has beer and cigarettes, but he has no obvious income of his own. she told me he’s very verbally abusive with her and calls her horrible names in front of the kids, in the end losing her place and going into a shelter with the kids I suppose is one way to get rid of him. however I’ve seen the circle before, she hates him right now but next week she could love him again who knows. i’m up in the morning after a good nights sleep, I can’t believe I actually slept well with all this on my mind, but looking at the situation with a clear mind as awful as foster care is, this is what it is coming to, and it may create some emotional damage separating the children but it’s definitely creating emotional damage leaving them in the situation they are in right now. And as you said it may cause the judge to reconsider placement with my son. I don’t think my son and his new girlfriend can handle eight children though, Her three and his five, that would definitely put a huge stressor on his current relationship and his girlfriend who has I said is a recovering addict. and I’m not sure they would consider giving him all five all by himself especially the 2 1/2 year old, perhaps it’s a gender bias thing but I just can’t see him being Mr. mom adequately, he’s surprise me before though with his capability when he wants something bad enough, So we’ll see. as it is I am just mentally fortifying myself for the storm that I know is to come, where she calls me in a panic because everything is falling apart and she’s going to lose the children and I am going to just tell her there’s nothing I can do to help. i’ve been here before with her, in the past for more than one move I ran around for days with her trying to help her find a place begging with landlords to give her an opportunity, have fronted the deposit so she could sign the application, taking time off work for said running around, Time off work for moving day, I have arranged and paid for movers because she didn’t have the money for it, just to have her turn around and decide in a year the place wasn’t good enough anymore and to do it all over again. so I’m done, At least those previous times she still had some semblance of normality in the house and she moved because she wanted to move up to nicer places and neighbourhoods for the children. this situation is different, she is in a nice place , a four bedroom two bathroom house, yard for the kids a good school a nice neighbourhood. she’s lived here for over a year and has made the rent and had no problems till this new guy moved in. Now its all fallen apart and rents have skyrocketed here lately that she has no options for decent housing for a family her size. I know the landlord is Eager to take this opportunity to get her out as it’s obvious in this market that they can get far more for the place then they are currently charging her. So When this happens I’m pretty sure my grandchildren will go into foster care, after that I just don’t know if she’s going to be able to get herself together enough to find housing and get them back out of foster care. i’m afraid they’re going to get stuck in the system for a long time, maybe this is partly my fault for helping so much in the past, There’s no way she would’ve kept custody and have kept having children without someone like me there to help her.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="skittles, post: 755303, member: 2484"] She is on assisstance, the waiting list for housing is long and priority goes to emergency situations. If she goes to a shelter she will be on the list, however we have Childrens Aid Society involved (we are in canada , CAS is the same as CPS in the US) so CAS would likely step in and place them in foster care if they were in a shelter . if they place the children , i’m not sure if she would still get priority over someone whose children have not been placed. It’s once they get in Foster care it seems very difficult to get them out.Regardless the list is so long for placement and she was in subsidized housing before, but as I said she’s very unrealistic and she decided she didn’t want to live in the “ghetto”, so she screwed up that opportunity as well. moved out with no notice didn’t pay last months rent etc. . i’m not sure if they’ll put her on the list again. it is heartbreaking because for the longest time I thought the kids were better with her rather than foster care or my son even though she moved a lot she was doing not too bad but things really fell apart when this new guy moved in. he causes problems with everyone, he threatened me at one point and I called the children’s aid, apparently the principal at the kids school called the police on him because he threaten the principal, and he beat up one of my daughter-in-law‘s old boyfriends in the driveway. he had let a friend leave a stolen car in the driveway, when the police came because he had threatened the principal they found the stolen car, He wouldn’t allow my daughter-in-law to say who left the car there as that would be ‘ratting’on his friend, so she was charged with with possession of stolen property. Financially she never seems to have enough money for anything anymore but he always has beer and cigarettes, but he has no obvious income of his own. she told me he’s very verbally abusive with her and calls her horrible names in front of the kids, in the end losing her place and going into a shelter with the kids I suppose is one way to get rid of him. however I’ve seen the circle before, she hates him right now but next week she could love him again who knows. i’m up in the morning after a good nights sleep, I can’t believe I actually slept well with all this on my mind, but looking at the situation with a clear mind as awful as foster care is, this is what it is coming to, and it may create some emotional damage separating the children but it’s definitely creating emotional damage leaving them in the situation they are in right now. And as you said it may cause the judge to reconsider placement with my son. I don’t think my son and his new girlfriend can handle eight children though, Her three and his five, that would definitely put a huge stressor on his current relationship and his girlfriend who has I said is a recovering addict. and I’m not sure they would consider giving him all five all by himself especially the 2 1/2 year old, perhaps it’s a gender bias thing but I just can’t see him being Mr. mom adequately, he’s surprise me before though with his capability when he wants something bad enough, So we’ll see. as it is I am just mentally fortifying myself for the storm that I know is to come, where she calls me in a panic because everything is falling apart and she’s going to lose the children and I am going to just tell her there’s nothing I can do to help. i’ve been here before with her, in the past for more than one move I ran around for days with her trying to help her find a place begging with landlords to give her an opportunity, have fronted the deposit so she could sign the application, taking time off work for said running around, Time off work for moving day, I have arranged and paid for movers because she didn’t have the money for it, just to have her turn around and decide in a year the place wasn’t good enough anymore and to do it all over again. so I’m done, At least those previous times she still had some semblance of normality in the house and she moved because she wanted to move up to nicer places and neighbourhoods for the children. this situation is different, she is in a nice place , a four bedroom two bathroom house, yard for the kids a good school a nice neighbourhood. she’s lived here for over a year and has made the rent and had no problems till this new guy moved in. Now its all fallen apart and rents have skyrocketed here lately that she has no options for decent housing for a family her size. I know the landlord is Eager to take this opportunity to get her out as it’s obvious in this market that they can get far more for the place then they are currently charging her. So When this happens I’m pretty sure my grandchildren will go into foster care, after that I just don’t know if she’s going to be able to get herself together enough to find housing and get them back out of foster care. i’m afraid they’re going to get stuck in the system for a long time, maybe this is partly my fault for helping so much in the past, There’s no way she would’ve kept custody and have kept having children without someone like me there to help her. [/QUOTE]
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