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Just Going to let it happen
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<blockquote data-quote="skittles" data-source="post: 755327" data-attributes="member: 2484"><p>Thankyou Copa, i never thought of the womens shelter but if this plays out as i expect i will suggest that to her as an alternative to the homeless shelter. I think they would be more supportive there for her. As for my son, its kind of a catch 22 for him. If on his own CAS isnt sure he has the parenting skills for 5 young children on his own, as i said i think we all have a bit of gender bias to moms there. They see him as more stable now that hes in a family unit with his girlfriend, and if she didnt have 3 of her own and a substance abuse history they might have considered him. I do think however that if they have no choice but to split the children, he may have a chance to take two of the boys that have stated a preference to living with their dad. The court recently granted overnight visits for those two with my son in recognition of my sons positive relationship with them. We have been discussing this and my son has made it clear to CAS he would like to be considered for those two if they wont consider sending all 5 to him. I also think your right that my ex daughter in law seems to want to let this happen. Shes said to me “im lost, i dont know what to do”, also “im afraid to leave him” I think shes so overwhelmed that shes just given up, it’s always worked in the past for her , by being deliberately helpless or passive , people such as me have stepped in , but no one is this time . her own family long ago wash their hands of the situation, and even if I wanted to do something she’s let it go too far this time. Anyway at this point its just wait and see what happens, the more i listen to all of you and relize this is likely inevitable, the more i see there could be large positives to it. One, its going to get rid of the new boyfriend if shes serious about it, two, my son has a good chance of getting custody of two of the boys, three , if she can get it togeather after eviction and placement of the remaining children, she will have to be more realistic of her capabilities and affirdability. If she only has three to look after plus the new baby coming, she can get a smaller place and maybe be more effective as a mom. The two boys that want to go to my son have behaviour issues, one is a high functioning autistic and her chaotic environment makes him extremely stressed. She will find it easier to parent the remaining children if he stays with his dad. And if none of the above occurs and all the children are placed , i pray they will find themselves in a positive envirinment with lots of visit time with their bio family. Thanks to all for your support <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="❤️" title="Red heart :heart:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/2764.png" data-shortname=":heart:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="skittles, post: 755327, member: 2484"] Thankyou Copa, i never thought of the womens shelter but if this plays out as i expect i will suggest that to her as an alternative to the homeless shelter. I think they would be more supportive there for her. As for my son, its kind of a catch 22 for him. If on his own CAS isnt sure he has the parenting skills for 5 young children on his own, as i said i think we all have a bit of gender bias to moms there. They see him as more stable now that hes in a family unit with his girlfriend, and if she didnt have 3 of her own and a substance abuse history they might have considered him. I do think however that if they have no choice but to split the children, he may have a chance to take two of the boys that have stated a preference to living with their dad. The court recently granted overnight visits for those two with my son in recognition of my sons positive relationship with them. We have been discussing this and my son has made it clear to CAS he would like to be considered for those two if they wont consider sending all 5 to him. I also think your right that my ex daughter in law seems to want to let this happen. Shes said to me “im lost, i dont know what to do”, also “im afraid to leave him” I think shes so overwhelmed that shes just given up, it’s always worked in the past for her , by being deliberately helpless or passive , people such as me have stepped in , but no one is this time . her own family long ago wash their hands of the situation, and even if I wanted to do something she’s let it go too far this time. Anyway at this point its just wait and see what happens, the more i listen to all of you and relize this is likely inevitable, the more i see there could be large positives to it. One, its going to get rid of the new boyfriend if shes serious about it, two, my son has a good chance of getting custody of two of the boys, three , if she can get it togeather after eviction and placement of the remaining children, she will have to be more realistic of her capabilities and affirdability. If she only has three to look after plus the new baby coming, she can get a smaller place and maybe be more effective as a mom. The two boys that want to go to my son have behaviour issues, one is a high functioning autistic and her chaotic environment makes him extremely stressed. She will find it easier to parent the remaining children if he stays with his dad. And if none of the above occurs and all the children are placed , i pray they will find themselves in a positive envirinment with lots of visit time with their bio family. Thanks to all for your support ❤️ [/QUOTE]
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