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Parent Emeritus
Just venting
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<blockquote data-quote="Acacia" data-source="post: 754271" data-attributes="member: 19832"><p>No, my difficult kids would not, have not, done anything for me at all. They, because of their dysfunction, drain energy. A wise person said, "Imagine you have a spiritual bank account. Do the people in your life drain energy from your account? How do you want to spend your spiritual dollars?" It appears I often squander mine.</p><p></p><p></p><p>I have been loyal to my own detriment, even in the face of their utter disregard for me. Also, when I keep trying to care for and please them despite their unkind behavior, I am betraying myself and my own values - not a good thing.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Yes, it has never worked, except momentarily. I am working to sit with the discomfort. In twelve step, they call it stinking thinking, torturing myself as I picture both of my older adult (in body only) children suffering and on the verge of homelessness again. I know for sure that my emotional suffering over my children's choices has never done anything but increase my own.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Acacia, post: 754271, member: 19832"] No, my difficult kids would not, have not, done anything for me at all. They, because of their dysfunction, drain energy. A wise person said, "Imagine you have a spiritual bank account. Do the people in your life drain energy from your account? How do you want to spend your spiritual dollars?" It appears I often squander mine. I have been loyal to my own detriment, even in the face of their utter disregard for me. Also, when I keep trying to care for and please them despite their unkind behavior, I am betraying myself and my own values - not a good thing. Yes, it has never worked, except momentarily. I am working to sit with the discomfort. In twelve step, they call it stinking thinking, torturing myself as I picture both of my older adult (in body only) children suffering and on the verge of homelessness again. I know for sure that my emotional suffering over my children's choices has never done anything but increase my own. [/QUOTE]
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