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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 166178" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi. Glad you dropped by. Many people will try to help you, if we can. First of all, how kind and generous of you and your husband to step in for these kids. Even if they don't understand what you did and maybe don't appreciate it, WE know how hard it can be.</p><p></p><p>I have some questions to ask you. First of all, have these three kids ever had evaluations done by a neuropsychologist or Psychiatrist (with the MD)? If not, I highly recommend doing that to the younger two. The oldest is no longer of age when you can do much unless she wants to get help. But the younger two can. Once you have them evaluated you can go from there.</p><p></p><p>PS--Guess I got some of it wrong. The pregnant young woman should have a full time job and plan on watching her babies herself. The 15 year old is the drug user--she's the one who needs rehab. Sorry.</p><p></p><p>Are there mood disorders or substance abuse on the family tree? Any mental illness? Neurological problems? I am guessing that the oldest probably has more going on than ADHD.</p><p></p><p>There is also possible attachment issues with all three children. Look up "attachment disorder" in the search engine of your choice. Attachment disorders often/usually do not stand all alone, but they are often co-morbid with other disorders in children who had big parental separations in their lives, like these kids did. </p><p></p><p>For the eighteen year old, I'd give her an ultimatum...drug rehab or leave. We had to do this for one of our kids and she left, but she did straighten out. I would give her no money, no insurance for any car, not even use of your car. She could get into it while high and kill herself or others or both. If she wants money, make her get a job. She can bike or walk or you can drive her, if you like. But I'd make her start working on herself or else make her leave. </p><p></p><p>I suggest going to Al-Anon (you'll get a lot of support there). </p><p>Meanwhile, schedule evaluations, and my professional of choice is a neuropsychologist. The testing is very intensive. They test for hours and often find things that were missed before.</p><p></p><p>Others will come along with their own suggestions. I am happy you posted.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 166178, member: 1550"] Hi. Glad you dropped by. Many people will try to help you, if we can. First of all, how kind and generous of you and your husband to step in for these kids. Even if they don't understand what you did and maybe don't appreciate it, WE know how hard it can be. I have some questions to ask you. First of all, have these three kids ever had evaluations done by a neuropsychologist or Psychiatrist (with the MD)? If not, I highly recommend doing that to the younger two. The oldest is no longer of age when you can do much unless she wants to get help. But the younger two can. Once you have them evaluated you can go from there. PS--Guess I got some of it wrong. The pregnant young woman should have a full time job and plan on watching her babies herself. The 15 year old is the drug user--she's the one who needs rehab. Sorry. Are there mood disorders or substance abuse on the family tree? Any mental illness? Neurological problems? I am guessing that the oldest probably has more going on than ADHD. There is also possible attachment issues with all three children. Look up "attachment disorder" in the search engine of your choice. Attachment disorders often/usually do not stand all alone, but they are often co-morbid with other disorders in children who had big parental separations in their lives, like these kids did. For the eighteen year old, I'd give her an ultimatum...drug rehab or leave. We had to do this for one of our kids and she left, but she did straighten out. I would give her no money, no insurance for any car, not even use of your car. She could get into it while high and kill herself or others or both. If she wants money, make her get a job. She can bike or walk or you can drive her, if you like. But I'd make her start working on herself or else make her leave. I suggest going to Al-Anon (you'll get a lot of support there). Meanwhile, schedule evaluations, and my professional of choice is a neuropsychologist. The testing is very intensive. They test for hours and often find things that were missed before. Others will come along with their own suggestions. I am happy you posted. [/QUOTE]
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