Hi, I'm hoping for some guidance. First I'll cut 'n paste from my post on the general board to explain what happened on Friday:
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My 1st grader just got sent home today - first time ever. The principal told me it's the first suspension all year long. I'm livid. I'm mortified. I'm ticked at the system.
My principal directed me to the handbook (Los Angeles Unified SD) to show me the reason he was suspended. When the teacher asked my son to hand her a little metal bolt he was playing with, he tossed it at her instead of handing it to her. He was sent home because he violated this:
Caused, attempted to cause, or threatened to cause physical injury to another person
I just got off the phone with his teacher. I asked, "Did you feel that he was trying to hurt you?"
She said, "No, I don't think he was trying to hurt me. But it's an automatic suspension if you throw something at a teacher." She said he did calm down afterward, but that she was so angry she felt "it was time," so she sent him to the Principal so he would be sent home.
Yes it's extremely rude, sure it's technically dangerous, yes she's put up with a lot of behaviors from him. But now it goes on his record that he was attempting to &*(ing harm his teacher? Aaaaaargh!
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My husband and I requested a meeting with both the principal and the teacher to talk over this. Here are the points I want to get across:
1. We aren't sure of *all* his diagnoses, but the child has a neurological condition (temporal lobe epilepsy) that predisposes him to having poor impulse control. Even if he tries very hard, he's not going to grow impulse control overnight.
2. He's on medication & therapy, and we are awaiting a neuro 2nd opinion that will happen next month. We are working on helping his behaviors every way we can. But it won't happen overnight.
3. Next time, if he acts out in this manner, is there another option aside from removing him from school and putting a black mark on his permanent record? How about sitting him in the Principal's office for a bit? How about sending him to another classroom? How about calling me in to help keep him under control? (As an aside I know a little boy who actually KICKED his teacher in anger this year and was not suspended. Why did they throw the book at my son, who had two perfect behavior days and two sick days that week?)
4. Is there anything we can do to amend or remove the reason for suspension in his permanent record?
So that's what I'm trying to deal with - do you think I'm approaching it properly? The Principal would like to bring in the school psychologist. Do you think it would be beneficial for me to try to bring in difficult child's therapist? He's great and he knows the school system very well.
Any input appreciated. I'm just sick over this.
*******
My 1st grader just got sent home today - first time ever. The principal told me it's the first suspension all year long. I'm livid. I'm mortified. I'm ticked at the system.
My principal directed me to the handbook (Los Angeles Unified SD) to show me the reason he was suspended. When the teacher asked my son to hand her a little metal bolt he was playing with, he tossed it at her instead of handing it to her. He was sent home because he violated this:
Caused, attempted to cause, or threatened to cause physical injury to another person
I just got off the phone with his teacher. I asked, "Did you feel that he was trying to hurt you?"
She said, "No, I don't think he was trying to hurt me. But it's an automatic suspension if you throw something at a teacher." She said he did calm down afterward, but that she was so angry she felt "it was time," so she sent him to the Principal so he would be sent home.
Yes it's extremely rude, sure it's technically dangerous, yes she's put up with a lot of behaviors from him. But now it goes on his record that he was attempting to &*(ing harm his teacher? Aaaaaargh!
******
My husband and I requested a meeting with both the principal and the teacher to talk over this. Here are the points I want to get across:
1. We aren't sure of *all* his diagnoses, but the child has a neurological condition (temporal lobe epilepsy) that predisposes him to having poor impulse control. Even if he tries very hard, he's not going to grow impulse control overnight.
2. He's on medication & therapy, and we are awaiting a neuro 2nd opinion that will happen next month. We are working on helping his behaviors every way we can. But it won't happen overnight.
3. Next time, if he acts out in this manner, is there another option aside from removing him from school and putting a black mark on his permanent record? How about sitting him in the Principal's office for a bit? How about sending him to another classroom? How about calling me in to help keep him under control? (As an aside I know a little boy who actually KICKED his teacher in anger this year and was not suspended. Why did they throw the book at my son, who had two perfect behavior days and two sick days that week?)
4. Is there anything we can do to amend or remove the reason for suspension in his permanent record?
So that's what I'm trying to deal with - do you think I'm approaching it properly? The Principal would like to bring in the school psychologist. Do you think it would be beneficial for me to try to bring in difficult child's therapist? He's great and he knows the school system very well.
Any input appreciated. I'm just sick over this.