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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 743814" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Is there a difference in ethnicity or social class? In the case of M's family, there are both. And a cultural difference. M is educated and was a high-achiever. His family, for the most, part, no. I think there is lots of envy and the sense that he does not deserve what he has, but they deserve it. </p><p></p><p>So I think in our case, there is sibling rivalry. But also class and cultural differences, and different expectations. Like I am horrified when they ask for huge quantities of money. Like houses. Or retainers for attorneys into the multiple thousands. It is not like we don't help these people. One of them has lived rent-free and all utilities paid in a property. And we gifted an old truck. It irks me that now he is selling the truck and believes even though it was ours, that he merits the profits.</p><p></p><p>But what can I do? This is them. And I am me. </p><p></p><p>But I still believe that Lil (and your husband) have the right idea. They do not take it in. They do not make it about them. There is no judgement. </p><p></p><p>I'm glad you have some peace with this Nomad.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 743814, member: 18958"] Is there a difference in ethnicity or social class? In the case of M's family, there are both. And a cultural difference. M is educated and was a high-achiever. His family, for the most, part, no. I think there is lots of envy and the sense that he does not deserve what he has, but they deserve it. So I think in our case, there is sibling rivalry. But also class and cultural differences, and different expectations. Like I am horrified when they ask for huge quantities of money. Like houses. Or retainers for attorneys into the multiple thousands. It is not like we don't help these people. One of them has lived rent-free and all utilities paid in a property. And we gifted an old truck. It irks me that now he is selling the truck and believes even though it was ours, that he merits the profits. But what can I do? This is them. And I am me. But I still believe that Lil (and your husband) have the right idea. They do not take it in. They do not make it about them. There is no judgement. I'm glad you have some peace with this Nomad. [/QUOTE]
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