Need help to identify paraphernalia...

[lovemyson1]

We used to find hallowed out pens and foil with residue too. Later found out our son was smoking heroin. I'm guessing that's what it is. I'm so sorry. I would suggest talking to her about it and seeing if she is willing to seek drug treatment. Sorry you're going through this, heroin is a terrible drug, difficult to quit and deadly.

 

[ksm]

I am calling her family doctor about ordering lab work...and also calling our health insurance company, and calling her psychologist... We were suppose to see her Wednesday, but they have changed her work schedule. So I got to find out when we can be seen. But I want to discuss these findings before we go to the appointment.

Tomorrow I have to start a bowel prep for a colonoscopy on Tuesday morning. So with that...and everything g else, it will be a crappy couple of days.

KSM

 

[jetsam]

hi, sorry u are going through this as well. sister keeper is spot on. My son started exactly that way..pills from the dr. for bad back and shoulder due to snowboarding accident then once he aged out of our insurance (26) went down hill real fast looking for drugs to substitute for the pills because he couldn't afford them and yes started smoking H (it was relatively cheap) before graduating to shooting up. He eventually went to jail for not showing up to court for a possession charge for 2 months. that seemed to ebb the shooting up thing and he proceeded to start taking suboxon to keep from doing the heroin.(also done illegally since he didn't have insurance) So now he is addicted to subs. he has weaned himself down to about 4mg a day (half a pill) but is psychologically addicted (since you really don't need suboxon for more than a week when detoxing) . Anyway i would definitely do testing and watch for mood swings. Also when my son was doing the heroin he would at sometimes fall asleep in mid sentence and then be awake for hours! Not eating very much..it kills their appetite..and throwing up often (they start to get sick when they start feeling effects of withdrawal) anyway just things to look for. good luck, and we are all here whenever you need

 

[GoingNorth]

Vomiting is also a side effect of opioids in general. It gets worse the higher the dose. I'm one of the lucky ducks who has to take an anti-nausea medication with opioids like Vicodin or Percocet.

Heroin users do puke a lot, but plenty of pill users do as well. Even people using opioids for justified reasons, such as short term for post-surgical/injury pain may puke from them.

 

[mof]

KSM

Good luck in these next few days. Crappy sums it up...but I guess you gotta start somewhere. I remember my son calling from college stomach sick...acted like he just got the flu...liar.

Praying for both of you...luckily, this too will pass.

Much hugs
Mof

 

[worried sick mother]

KSM,
Just wanted to say that I'm so sorry for all you're having to deal with. This sounds way more serious than just marjuana. I think you could start with a home drug test, the one that around $40 that test for several drugs, then if you don't get answers you could do the hair test. I say use whatever leverage you have to get your daughter help especially while she's a minor. I'm sending you prayers! Hugs!!!

 

[RN0441]

KSM

Why not take your findings to the police and ask them what those items are used for instead of guessing? I'm not sure they would help you but I suspect they would.

I'd get her into rehab. She is a minor so you have control. It may not keep her clean forever but at least you (and she) can get some education on what you're dealing with. We learned so much when my son went to rehab the first time.

My son started going off the rails when he was 15. He is now 21 and still not doing much with his life. I have never seen foil though but would be concerned.

My heart goes out to you. I know this is your granddaughter. Tough stuff.

 

[ksm]

I called the customer assistance number on the back of our ins. card.

Ugghh! No help at all. The best they have to offer is to take her to our local mental health facility, which is what we did almost two years ago when she snuck out and was found at boyfriend house by police. Tested positive for weed. But then pretended to be suicidal to draw attention away from boyfriend. The MH facility then made us go to place almost 3 hours away for three nights. Then they were ready to release her even though she was still threatening to harm herself if she couldn't be involved with boyfriend. Of course, they were releasing her because ins

When I mentioned that MH place does not do drug tests...I was told that family doctor might order, but Difficult Child would have to sign a release for us to know the results!!! OMG! She is not an adult yet! I am still financially responsible for her and my portion of the test, but I am not allowed to know what she is using??!

So basically, I am to take her to a place that I can't force her to go, and have a test that I may not know, but still legally and financially responsible for her and what she does! This is insane.

I am waiting for psychologist to call. Plus, we are to see the pediatric cardiologist in two weeks...if she has been using drugs, they probably won't be serious about looking for other causes...and I really can't blame them.

Waiting for my son to stop by - I have a feeling he will know or have a clue what she is doing, because if his past addictions.

I am thinking about the Police as an option... I might tell Difficult Child that either she takes the test, we all know what we are dealing with, or I contact the police and give them the drug stuff.,.

KSM

 

[AppleCori]

That seems like the best leverage you have, KSM.

If she won't submit to drug screening and allow you to see the results, the only other option you have is to take it to the police and let them deal with it.

This could result in involving her friends, suppliers, old boyfriend, the kids' parents. Maybe she would be worried about that if you brought it up to her.

 

[Sister's Keeper]

The insurance person did not tell you the truth. She is a minor, and unless the issue is related to reproduction (pregnancy, birth control, abortion, etc) you will be given and have the right to know the results.

Also, keep in mind if you wait she won't test positive for anything other than marijuana. Cocaine, opiates, and meth only stay in your system anywhere between 2-5 days depending on how heavy of a user you are.

Most addicts are smart enough to know this.

 

[pasajes4]

Take the stuff you have ta police station ask them to test it. I have done this and they told me what it was. They kept the stuff (fine by me) and kiddo was on their radar.

 

[AppleCori]

Yeah, if most drugs are gone from the system in a few days, it may already be too late to drug test her.

Police station sounds like the best idea.

 

[RN0441]

I would take it to the police without her knowledge but still use it as a threat - she doesn't have to know everything.

Police deal with this all the time. I don't think they'll make you go full disclosure anyway.

I do know that minors do have some rights - where parents are kept in the dark. It is shocking I know since we are paying but that happened to us also but I cannot remember exactly what the situation was.

I think my mind glosses over details to help me cope.

 

[Go slow mama]

Here in Canada we cannot drug test kids past 16 and we cannot force treatment past 16 either. We are handcuffed as parents who remain financially and emotionally liable. I work in front line law enforcement and I firmly believe that the insufficient and lenient response of our systems only makes this stuff all the more difficult. There's no where that I could even request let alone get a drug test. All of this soft on youth stuff makes a parent's work so much more difficult and without reinforcement.

I feel for you. As best you can get your thoughts clear I wish you thoughtful and dispassionate clarity.

 

[susiestar]

When my oldest was 13 he heard about other minors keeping parents out of their medical and psychological records. I made a new family rule at that time, which is still in place today. My house, my rules, Know what I mean?? The rule is that I have complete access to ALL records as long as they live in my home or under my $$ (dorm or whatever). To date it hasn't been an issue, but my kids know it is a rule that I will NOT budge even a tiny bit on.

I would guess that she used the foil for meth as her boyfriend does, or I think I read that. For some reason, users like to get their boyfriends or girlfriends to use the same things they do. I hope and pray I am wrong.

 

[BusynMember]

As Susie says, you can say that if your child's medication info is hidden from you or child won't go, then a cell phone, car, junk food, money etc. Will not be dispersed to the child. There are ways.

 

[Sister's Keeper]

It is not true. If you are in the US and she is under 18 and you are her legal guardian then you have access to all her records except for those involving matters of reproduction, and in some cases, of course, particular details shared with a mental health provider.

She can refuse, and at her age it is unlikely that they will hold her down and perform the test, but chances are she isn't aware of that.

Results of drug screens are routinely shared with parents. If she is over 18 it is a game changer, but as long as she is a minor and you are her legal guardian you will have access t the results.

 

[ksm]

DS thinks the items were used for weed. It did smell like weed to him, and he said the pieces were too small for doing other drugs, that she probable used the small piece of foil as a "screen" to use to smoke pot. He said that you would need a much bigger piece for other drugs, as you wouldn't want to risk having it fall off. There is one piece that is about 1/2" X 3/4" that is charred.

We have talked to Difficult Child and she only admits to occasional weed. I want to believe her...but I don't know what to believe any more. But the fact that she has done this in our home really ticks me off!

On the plus side, she is following rules about curfew. Is working part time. Is going to school and staying there. And after 2 weeks of school, has three classes that are 100%, one at 94% and one, the teacher has not put in any grades, but I assume is an A also. It is human growth and development. She excels at science type classes.

So the struggle continues... Short of locking her up at home, and home schooling...not sure what to do. Which is not an option. Will be talking to her psychologist, who did call me yesterday and she said Difficult Child had admitted to some weed use, but has never disclosed anything stronger. She did say if Difficult Child disclosed more harmful behavior, she would alert me.

KSM

 

[mof]

Happy for the positive news...you have done whAt you can.

Stay strong!

 

[Sister's Keeper]

I'm glad for the somewhat positive update. I'm soft on weed in adults, but I have an issue with any children using psychoactive substances.

I guess, really, the only thing you can do is state your rules on drug use, and continue to mete out consequences as necessary.

The school update is great. I forget that so many people go back before we do. We don't start until Wednesday.