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Substance Abuse
Nothing's gottten easier
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<blockquote data-quote="Elsi" data-source="post: 741563" data-attributes="member: 23349"><p>Helpless, I know how tempting it is to try to rewrite history and think ‘if only’ I would have done things differently, everything would be ok now. But there is no way of knowing. Some things can’t be easily fixed, no matter how early we start. Both of my difficult ones had extensive therapy starting in their tweens. I’ve tried to connect them with services as adults. They were very good at saying whatever they thought a therapist would want to hear. It didn’t make any difference in the end - here we still are. So don’t beat up on yourself. Change is going to have to come from him, when he wants to make it happen. Sadly, we can’t impose it from the outside. </p><p></p><p>Perhaps the change of scenery with his dad will help. I know some young men respond better to a male authority figure. Job Corp sounds like a great suggestion. I think these kids need to find their own motivations for stopping destructive and self-destructive behaviors - they have to have a vision of themselves in a different kind of life that they are willing to work towards. </p><p></p><p>In the meantime, take care of yourself. Perhaps put away the photo albums for a while, if they are causing you pain. Now is a time for self care. Hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Elsi, post: 741563, member: 23349"] Helpless, I know how tempting it is to try to rewrite history and think ‘if only’ I would have done things differently, everything would be ok now. But there is no way of knowing. Some things can’t be easily fixed, no matter how early we start. Both of my difficult ones had extensive therapy starting in their tweens. I’ve tried to connect them with services as adults. They were very good at saying whatever they thought a therapist would want to hear. It didn’t make any difference in the end - here we still are. So don’t beat up on yourself. Change is going to have to come from him, when he wants to make it happen. Sadly, we can’t impose it from the outside. Perhaps the change of scenery with his dad will help. I know some young men respond better to a male authority figure. Job Corp sounds like a great suggestion. I think these kids need to find their own motivations for stopping destructive and self-destructive behaviors - they have to have a vision of themselves in a different kind of life that they are willing to work towards. In the meantime, take care of yourself. Perhaps put away the photo albums for a while, if they are causing you pain. Now is a time for self care. Hugs. [/QUOTE]
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