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Nowhere to turn 19 year old daughter out of control
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 743712" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Add me to those who think this is between mother and daughter and the father if he is in her life. She will resent you for getting involved and if you are the one taking charge your wife can also come to resent it.</p><p></p><p>I think ASPD is a useful issue to know IF it seems like it fits because it alerts the parents to take care of themselves. People without a conscience tend to break the laws,lie, steal, assault with no remorse, sexually act out, lose custody of children at times due to no nprmal love feelings etc. To me, a layperson she doesn't seem off the rails enough for ASPD. You dont seem scared of her either. Also I have been a mental health client since age 23 and although real help that the client wants is invaluable, there is no scientific way yet to prove a diagnosis. Psychiatry is guesswork. And work on theclients part so she must want to change.</p><p></p><p>I would not even pay attention to any diagnosis not made by a long term psychiatrist with the MD, but they can also be wrong. Two psychiatrists can give two completely diffetent diagnoses and there is no blood test or x ray to check for accuracy. It's inexact, not provable. The DSM diagnoses are created by a show of hands. Thats all. Look it up. </p><p></p><p>Be leery of any diagnosis. We are not there yet in terms of psychiatry being a true science. It is a lot theory. Nobody even knows why certain psychiatric medications help. Nobody is sure if a mental heslth disorder is a chemical imbalance in the brain or something else. This is all theory at this point do we have to be careful and leery.</p><p></p><p>I think talking in detail to your wife is best. It isnt your child. I never think its a good plan for a stepparent to take over. When I remarried, decisions about my kids were made by me and the father. My hub was a friend until we had our own kids. That worked out really well.</p><p></p><p>My two cents is that the decision about what to do needs to come from your wife. Is step daughter still in school? Over 18? Physically violent?Dangerous? Or just defiant? Drugs? The police been called?</p><p></p><p>You may want to get into marital therapy if she is causing a problem between.you two. And some of us have made our younger teenage kids</p><p> leave but mostly for crime, danger and drugs. It is reasonable to expect safety in your own home.</p><p></p><p>Others will come along too!; I like Smithsmoms advice.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 743712, member: 1550"] Add me to those who think this is between mother and daughter and the father if he is in her life. She will resent you for getting involved and if you are the one taking charge your wife can also come to resent it. I think ASPD is a useful issue to know IF it seems like it fits because it alerts the parents to take care of themselves. People without a conscience tend to break the laws,lie, steal, assault with no remorse, sexually act out, lose custody of children at times due to no nprmal love feelings etc. To me, a layperson she doesn't seem off the rails enough for ASPD. You dont seem scared of her either. Also I have been a mental health client since age 23 and although real help that the client wants is invaluable, there is no scientific way yet to prove a diagnosis. Psychiatry is guesswork. And work on theclients part so she must want to change. I would not even pay attention to any diagnosis not made by a long term psychiatrist with the MD, but they can also be wrong. Two psychiatrists can give two completely diffetent diagnoses and there is no blood test or x ray to check for accuracy. It's inexact, not provable. The DSM diagnoses are created by a show of hands. Thats all. Look it up. Be leery of any diagnosis. We are not there yet in terms of psychiatry being a true science. It is a lot theory. Nobody even knows why certain psychiatric medications help. Nobody is sure if a mental heslth disorder is a chemical imbalance in the brain or something else. This is all theory at this point do we have to be careful and leery. I think talking in detail to your wife is best. It isnt your child. I never think its a good plan for a stepparent to take over. When I remarried, decisions about my kids were made by me and the father. My hub was a friend until we had our own kids. That worked out really well. My two cents is that the decision about what to do needs to come from your wife. Is step daughter still in school? Over 18? Physically violent?Dangerous? Or just defiant? Drugs? The police been called? You may want to get into marital therapy if she is causing a problem between.you two. And some of us have made our younger teenage kids leave but mostly for crime, danger and drugs. It is reasonable to expect safety in your own home. Others will come along too!; I like Smithsmoms advice. [/QUOTE]
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Nowhere to turn 19 year old daughter out of control
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