J
Jan71
Guest
I love this forum, and I would be on it more often, were it not for the chaos in my home.
My 7yo difficult child son, has been home with me since school let out. My hubby works during the day. He has ADHD and ODD and is presently taking Concerta (36 mg.), a switch from Focalin XR last week. He is completely out of control at times every day. He typically does the opposite of whatever I would like for him to do. Sometimes, this is quite senseless. For example, this morning, we went to pick strawberries, and he refused to stay in the row to which we were assigned. He would pick strawberries from any other row but the one that we were supposed to be using. To make a long story short, because I could not get him to come around to following directions, after explaining why we needed to stay in that row, we were nearly asked to leave the strawberry patch!! We can't even do a small enjoyable thing together. The ODD is SO hard to live with.
Anyway, as the day continues, difficult child goes on his scooter down the road with his older, 14yo brother and my nephew. He refused to move over to the side of the road when a car was coming, as he was told to do by his older brother!! My 14 yo tried to physically make him get to the side of the road, and difficult child hits and scratches him. I tried to intervene and get him to come back home safely, and he raises his fist to me and screams and yells and continues, to my horror, scooter right on by, even further toward the highway. He ignores my pleas for him to move to the side of the road. My sister, who is bigger than me, manages to catch him, and drag him kicking and screaming, scratching and hitting and throwing gravel at her, back into our house, up the stairs, and into his room. He is enraged and completely unreasonable. He will not calm down. He throws things all over his room. He raised the phone at me, and threatened to whip it at my head.
This happens in some form every single day. Two days ago, he threw a large pail at me in the driveway, stomped on my feet, and beat me as hard as he could with his fists because I told him "no" to something he wanted. I have bruises and scratches all over. I also have a severe hearing sensitivity and loud tinnitus, of which difficult child is aware, and so he screams as loudly as possible to hurt me. These screaming fits can set my hearing back for weeks or months. It could even cause permanent damage.
If anyone were to witness my difficult child's behavior, they would think he was the most sassy, terrible, naughty, disobedient, aggressive, angry, defiant, and undisciplined child on the planet.
He did better at school while on his medication, but since school let out, he's been off the deep end with bad behavior at home. I can't control him physically. He weighs 50 pounds now, and when he's hitting, I refuse to get into it physically with him in any way. I don't really know what to do. I am finding that he's too old to manage physically with these problems. He refuses to go to summer school in the mornings, which is supposed to be fun. He chose to sit in the car with me this week one day for the four hours summer school was in session, rather than go into the building.
Others in my family have suggested a good hard spanking or slap to the mouth, etc. We have used time outs and are more recently trying to implement Dr. Greene's methods from the Explosive Child book. They help somewhat so far, but in the safety situation I just mentioned (scooter episode), it didn't work at all.
We've had difficult child evaluated at the children's hopsital (multi-disciplinary), and he was diagnosed with severe ADHD and apraxia of speech. He also has ODD, however, they did not believe he has a mood disorder or any autistic issues.
We obviously need help. Where do I go from here? Who can I tell that my 7yo is abusive toward me? What am I doing wrong? How can I stop his aggressiveness? It seems to be his new pattern for the summer. I'm not sure, but he seems to be meaner and more aggressive on his medication than off of it. What about respite care or in-home services? I'm so burned out.
My sister says he's just choosing to be naughty and knows what he is doing; that he is just pushing the limits over the top. I know she thinks we're not firm enough with disciplining him. It stings when family will not acknowledge the disorder.
Is there any help for ODD?
Jan
My 7yo difficult child son, has been home with me since school let out. My hubby works during the day. He has ADHD and ODD and is presently taking Concerta (36 mg.), a switch from Focalin XR last week. He is completely out of control at times every day. He typically does the opposite of whatever I would like for him to do. Sometimes, this is quite senseless. For example, this morning, we went to pick strawberries, and he refused to stay in the row to which we were assigned. He would pick strawberries from any other row but the one that we were supposed to be using. To make a long story short, because I could not get him to come around to following directions, after explaining why we needed to stay in that row, we were nearly asked to leave the strawberry patch!! We can't even do a small enjoyable thing together. The ODD is SO hard to live with.
Anyway, as the day continues, difficult child goes on his scooter down the road with his older, 14yo brother and my nephew. He refused to move over to the side of the road when a car was coming, as he was told to do by his older brother!! My 14 yo tried to physically make him get to the side of the road, and difficult child hits and scratches him. I tried to intervene and get him to come back home safely, and he raises his fist to me and screams and yells and continues, to my horror, scooter right on by, even further toward the highway. He ignores my pleas for him to move to the side of the road. My sister, who is bigger than me, manages to catch him, and drag him kicking and screaming, scratching and hitting and throwing gravel at her, back into our house, up the stairs, and into his room. He is enraged and completely unreasonable. He will not calm down. He throws things all over his room. He raised the phone at me, and threatened to whip it at my head.
This happens in some form every single day. Two days ago, he threw a large pail at me in the driveway, stomped on my feet, and beat me as hard as he could with his fists because I told him "no" to something he wanted. I have bruises and scratches all over. I also have a severe hearing sensitivity and loud tinnitus, of which difficult child is aware, and so he screams as loudly as possible to hurt me. These screaming fits can set my hearing back for weeks or months. It could even cause permanent damage.
If anyone were to witness my difficult child's behavior, they would think he was the most sassy, terrible, naughty, disobedient, aggressive, angry, defiant, and undisciplined child on the planet.
He did better at school while on his medication, but since school let out, he's been off the deep end with bad behavior at home. I can't control him physically. He weighs 50 pounds now, and when he's hitting, I refuse to get into it physically with him in any way. I don't really know what to do. I am finding that he's too old to manage physically with these problems. He refuses to go to summer school in the mornings, which is supposed to be fun. He chose to sit in the car with me this week one day for the four hours summer school was in session, rather than go into the building.
Others in my family have suggested a good hard spanking or slap to the mouth, etc. We have used time outs and are more recently trying to implement Dr. Greene's methods from the Explosive Child book. They help somewhat so far, but in the safety situation I just mentioned (scooter episode), it didn't work at all.
We've had difficult child evaluated at the children's hopsital (multi-disciplinary), and he was diagnosed with severe ADHD and apraxia of speech. He also has ODD, however, they did not believe he has a mood disorder or any autistic issues.
We obviously need help. Where do I go from here? Who can I tell that my 7yo is abusive toward me? What am I doing wrong? How can I stop his aggressiveness? It seems to be his new pattern for the summer. I'm not sure, but he seems to be meaner and more aggressive on his medication than off of it. What about respite care or in-home services? I'm so burned out.
My sister says he's just choosing to be naughty and knows what he is doing; that he is just pushing the limits over the top. I know she thinks we're not firm enough with disciplining him. It stings when family will not acknowledge the disorder.
Is there any help for ODD?
Jan
