On A Happier Note....A Ncihole update

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Nichole is growing up quite nicely. :D

boyfriend had volunteered to give her the money to pay her insurance because her school loan money was running low and she still needed sister in law to do repairs on the car and didn't know how much $$ that was going to amt to. Then, in true form, boyfriend proceeded to immediately start holding the "money" (that he hand't even given her yet) over her head and telling her that she had to do this or that or he wasn't paying up.

Nichole told him to take his money and shove it where the sun don't shine. And went out and paid for her plates and insurance herself with her own money. :D Then got together with sister in law about the car repairs.

This is something that has always tickled me. sister in law views Nichole as the lil sis he never had. (until his adopted one 3 yrs ago). He is protective of her and determined she's not gonna be one of those weak females at the mercy of some jerk.

So, Nichole can change tires, replace brakes, change oil, replace spark plugs, replace both oil filter and air filters. lol Poor kid gets all that done on her lil piece of clunky junky metro and they go to fill it with gas........

It won't back out of the drive. She had the E brake on. It's been parked all these months with her just starting it to keep the engine from locking up. Well, the brakes rusted together.:faint: sister in law doesn't know if he can fix it. So he gets on my computer and looks it up. Turns out a lot of oil later and they finally get it moving..........But my word, the noise!!! Nothing like metal grating on metal. Even if it's rusty.

Nichole is now my legal driver and she did it all by herself. :D (talk about a boost in confidence) She drove the car all day to knock the rust off the brakes and now it's just fine. Splurged and bought herself some cheap floor pads and a steering wheel cover. lol

Then came in and told me this evening that when she buys her next car she will listen to sister in law's opinion and follow his advice. :rofl: She didn't, and has a clunky awful looking metro when she could've had one in great shape for the same price the following week. sister in law has never let her forget it. She knows she hurt his feelings terribly when she didn't listen to him.

Nichole is on the track to independence. boyfriend's drama is becoming more and more obvious as his attempts to control her more desperate. And she's shooting him down left and right. No drama, just says her piece, walks away and does what she wants anyway.

Now this is the little girl I raised. :D Awesome to see her again.

Nichole helps around here more than ever. Has been putting in the hours helping me get the big cleaning caught up. Will be spending all day tomorrow cleaning with me........

I'll be watching Aubrey on Sats unfortunately. It had been arranged that boyfriend's Dad would do it. But that would mean boyfriend's Mom would have her all morning. And sad as it is to say.....boyfriend's Mom resents and focuses her anger onto Aubrey. Neither Nichole or I will allow her to ever be alone with the baby. Which is how I wound up with the job. boyfriend works friday nights and has to sleep. Daycare isn't open weekends. I'll cope, and Aubrey will be safe from potential abuse.

Nichole is determined to make top grades in the paramedic program. She's worried she might not study enough or the right way. lol (imagine)

A leetle birdie told me not long ago that if boyfriend doesn't get his act in order it's not gonna be long before Nichole walks away for the last time. She realizes now that he has some serious difficult child issues of his own, many caused by his vicious mother who is becoming more and more unstable each day. But she has little empathy for him when she worked so hard to overcome her own issues and he does nothing to help himself.

The way she communicates with him now is soooo drastically different. I didn't use talk, because it is communicating. And he just doesn't get it. He keeps thinking the old routine is eventually gonna work again. But it's only digging the hole deeper.

We spend so much time together these days. We talk so much. Open, honest, grown up talking. So nice. And she goes out and has fun with her friend S. S is also a difficult child, but not so bad once you get to know her. Needy, unsure of herself, but loves to hang out here because we're laid back and .......get this! "normal". :rofl: And I try hard not to chuckle when I watch Nichole trying hard to guide this girl who is in some ways like she herself was not long ago and mother her. But hey, she did get S to enroll in college. lol

So, all in all, a good update. As with any difficult child there is always the worry that I've just brought the board curse down upon us. And of course there is always that risk of backsliding. But I think, in my humble opinion, Nichole has made it over the hurdle and is on her way to becoming a bona fide easy child. :D

Covering head hoping the board curse does not come into play!
 

susiestar

Roll With It
Very Proud of both you and Nichole!!! So happy she is seeing through boyfriend's attempts to control her. Esp glad she will not let boyfriend's vicious mom have any time alone with aubrey. Our kids may have their "moments" but they seem to be pretty good parents, don't they? I would hate to see what Nichole would do to anyone who abused Aubrey, wouldn't you? But the person would deserve it.

I hope someday Aubrey has 2 parents who have their acts together, but having one parent who has overcome what Nichole has certainly makes Aubrey a lucky girl.

Is Nichole going to have the pediatrician watch for the kind of problems step difficult child has? Seems like it would be an important piece of info for the pediatrician to have.

Hugs, and Kudos to Nichole!

susie
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Susie

Yes. Nichole is going to inform the pediatrician doctor. Well, actually easy child already has since pediatrician doctor/OB/ fam doctor are all the same guy and she saw him yesterday. But Nichole will remind him too to make sure it's placed into Aubrey's file. doctor is going to have the ultrasound tech pay special attention to the brain and spinal cord on the new baby when easy child has it done in 2 weeks.
 

janebrain

New Member
Hi Lisa,
what a great post! I'm so glad to hear of Nichole's progress--she has come such a long way lately hasn't she? It is so nice when they actually are able to grow and learn!
Jane
 
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