POLICE

[Sam3]

Sam, Funny you should say that. My therapist assumed that I wanted to discuss my abusive husband/boyfrend relationship. When I informed her it was my adult son, her head did a little bobble while she was doing her best to not show any reaction.

A little embarrassing but also I would be a little miffed if she didn't put you at ease about that. Professionals know best that domestic violence isn't unique to romantic relationships or about them. Anyone within swinging distance is the potential victim of a person who would rather brawl than face their demons. Child abuse, elder abuse, wife beating, and even parent abuse.

 

[susiestar]

Oh, abuse of parents is still rarely recognized. Back when Wiz went to live with my parents, our domestic violence center had never even heard of a parent needing treatment for abuse caused by their child. They offered individual therapy because it is clearly a situation of domestic violence, just not the standard one they see. Normally they insist on group therapy before individual therapy, but there was no group to have therapy with.

There are a lot of therapists out there who still think that men cannot be victims of domestic violence, and who have all sorts of other bizarre prejudices about it. So you have to screen your therapist carefully. If the therapist isn't working, or isn't able to adapt to what you need, find another one. Being surprised is one thing. Being unable to cope with it is another.

 

[TerriH]

Pasa, sometimes it is hard to predict what will work. My youngest used to take money from family members when he could. We always made him pay it back and would assign consequences, but still he took things!

When he was 18 he took a smallish amount of money from his sister's bank account and she pressed charges. After paying restitution and court costs to the tune of $800 he pretty much quit taking things: I think he had a minor slip once but that was it.

I could never predict what my kids would take to heart, but, they did mostly learn things.

Eventually.

It did take a while for the both of them, and for a bit I thought they would NEVER learn, but the both of them are doing OK, now. They are not perfect, never hat, but it is much calmer than it used to be.