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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 751068" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>If this were Kay, she would be blocked. There is no excuse,, not mental illness or being high, to threaten harm to anyone</p><p></p><p> I am no hero. I let Kay get away with her threats although none were that violent. The way I have changed, today I would probably call the police and maybe get a restraining order. Josh is too sick in my opinion to be around you. How, God bless us, do we know somebody won't act on such things?</p><p></p><p>I have no magic words or solutions. If this were me, my first priority would be the safety of the rest of the family. I am not sure about.my sister. I might feel morally obligated to show her what he wrote so that she can protect herself, if she feels the need. If he hurts her, you may feel terrible because there is not full disclosure.</p><p></p><p>One thing I am learning slowly is that letting them get away with violent threats and and even violence against people because, of "mental illness," can be lethal for them and others.</p><p></p><p>Most mentally ill people do not speak like that. If they do, they are taken out of society. It is illegal to make those types of threats. Why do we let them? We would not let anyone else address us with violent venom. Kay finally got dangerous against our son. She could have killed him if her aim had been better. She had been ramping up her verbal violence but we told ourselves she just needed help. I'm not so sure now that her long term tendency to frighten and harm us can be treated. We will never know. She will not get help. Nothing is wrong with her per Kay. It is us. It is that we kidnapped her from her birth country. Blah, blah, blah.</p><p></p><p>We never allowed her in our house again after the incident with our son. This had not been the first time she tried to hurt somebody but we told ourselves she was sorry. Haha. Sure. We take that seriously now. She doesn't make violent threats because when she did after that, we called the police. Kids do not do this. It is way off the rails. For us, it is not tolerated anymore. I have other kids for comparison. Kay is a bully who can hurt us. Yes, maybe she hss depression, anxiety, borderline or even reactive attachment disorder.</p><p></p><p>None of that makes it okay for her to hurt or threaten to hurt or kill anyone and we are finally in a place where she knows we will press charges if she does.</p><p></p><p>I am called by my first name, called abusive, called sexual names and cussed out, but the days of Kay threatening harm are over. But we still will not let her into our home. For years she had to meet us at a restaurant to see us. We go to the park, or WENT to the park to see Jaden. Now she cut us off. I don't miss the circus. We only wonder what to do about Jaden. We are all discussing this. CPS is an option.</p><p></p><p>Violent verbal talk is not okay and can be a percurser to actual violence. Not saying it is, but.....</p><p></p><p>God bless you. Your plate is full. I am so sorry. Protect yourself please. You can protect yourselves, not fix your son. All we can change is ourselves.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 751068, member: 23706"] If this were Kay, she would be blocked. There is no excuse,, not mental illness or being high, to threaten harm to anyone I am no hero. I let Kay get away with her threats although none were that violent. The way I have changed, today I would probably call the police and maybe get a restraining order. Josh is too sick in my opinion to be around you. How, God bless us, do we know somebody won't act on such things? I have no magic words or solutions. If this were me, my first priority would be the safety of the rest of the family. I am not sure about.my sister. I might feel morally obligated to show her what he wrote so that she can protect herself, if she feels the need. If he hurts her, you may feel terrible because there is not full disclosure. One thing I am learning slowly is that letting them get away with violent threats and and even violence against people because, of "mental illness," can be lethal for them and others. Most mentally ill people do not speak like that. If they do, they are taken out of society. It is illegal to make those types of threats. Why do we let them? We would not let anyone else address us with violent venom. Kay finally got dangerous against our son. She could have killed him if her aim had been better. She had been ramping up her verbal violence but we told ourselves she just needed help. I'm not so sure now that her long term tendency to frighten and harm us can be treated. We will never know. She will not get help. Nothing is wrong with her per Kay. It is us. It is that we kidnapped her from her birth country. Blah, blah, blah. We never allowed her in our house again after the incident with our son. This had not been the first time she tried to hurt somebody but we told ourselves she was sorry. Haha. Sure. We take that seriously now. She doesn't make violent threats because when she did after that, we called the police. Kids do not do this. It is way off the rails. For us, it is not tolerated anymore. I have other kids for comparison. Kay is a bully who can hurt us. Yes, maybe she hss depression, anxiety, borderline or even reactive attachment disorder. None of that makes it okay for her to hurt or threaten to hurt or kill anyone and we are finally in a place where she knows we will press charges if she does. I am called by my first name, called abusive, called sexual names and cussed out, but the days of Kay threatening harm are over. But we still will not let her into our home. For years she had to meet us at a restaurant to see us. We go to the park, or WENT to the park to see Jaden. Now she cut us off. I don't miss the circus. We only wonder what to do about Jaden. We are all discussing this. CPS is an option. Violent verbal talk is not okay and can be a percurser to actual violence. Not saying it is, but..... God bless you. Your plate is full. I am so sorry. Protect yourself please. You can protect yourselves, not fix your son. All we can change is ourselves. [/QUOTE]
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