She calls this afternoon....

[mrscatinthehat]

To tell us of another whole she poked in her head. She pierced her eyebrow. I said ok hang on a sec. I called for husband. He spoke to her a few and then said I don't think so but hang on. I got the phone back. "mom are you ok?" "OF course why wouldn't I be?" "Well I figured you would be mad so I wanted to tell you before someone else did."

"No, I am just sitting here reading a book. If you want to continue to torture yourself and cause your self pain that is your choice I am not mad."

"That is not what I am doing. I love you."

I told her I loved her too and she got off the phone. Then of course after I made sure it was disconnected I screamed at her for her further stupidity at trying to get a rise out of me by hurting herself. But so proud to keep it even keel on the phone. It always blows her mind that I can keep it cool when she tells me this stuff. She wonders though why then when she says she hasn't done anything to not follow the rules why we shake our heads. Guardianship of an adult child that is still out of control is so much fun.

beth

 

[Hound dog]

Beth

You handled it beautifully. When it gets to you, and I know it does, remember she is doing this to her own body, not yours. She has to live with it, not you. It's her people will stare at. It helps.

There was a time I wondered if Nichole would grow out of this stage. Not that the piercing ever bothered me. I only worried because she never stopped to think about her metal allergies and the darn things always got horribly infected. So she'd wind up having to let them close and waste the money spent.

Hopefully now that the thrill of "shocking" you is gone, she'll pass out of this faster.

((hugs))

 

[Suz]

Lisa nailed with with the "thrill of shocking you" comment.

When I stopped reacting to Rob's piercings (21 at one point- on ears, eyebrows, etc) the fun was gone. Now he only wears 2 ---one in each ear. Of course he's exchanged piercings for tattoos so get ready to not react to this next step.

Good for you, Beth!

Suz

 

[Abbey]

Perfect, Beth. She wanted drama and didn't get it. Oh, well. Now she's sitting with a hole in her brow.

Abbey

 

[witzend]

My hat is off to you, Beth. Not reacting on the phone is definitely something I need to work on.

 

[meowbunny]

The good part is that when she's had enough of the pain and new holes and people staring and not trying to upset you, the holes grow over. I used to pretend that the piercings bothered me (they didn't), but I did make it abundantly clear that if she got a tattoo she would not be coming into my home again. They truly are against our religion.