Shocker....I have concerns....

[Nancy]

PG I have been there done that so many times waiting for the other shoe to drop. What you are seeing with your difficult child now, with her helping out at the home and how the others like her so much, seeing her relaxed and happy, I've seen that with my difficult child when she was int he sober house too. It literally made me cry to see her so content and happy. So now that she is no longer sober you would think I would be devastated. I was for a while, but I still have that image of her cutting grass at the sober house or working the fund raiser or making dinner for the girls and I remember how how happy she was and I know she can be there again. I think that in some corner of her mind and her heart she remembers those times too and wants them back. I hold those images very close to my heart and it gives me hope.

So for today she is doing exactly what she should be doing and she is changing brain connections and those connections will stay with her. I hope your difficult child feels this peacefulness and acceptance in her soul and never wants to let it go.

Nancy

 

[PatriotsGirl]

PG I have been there done that so many times waiting for the other shoe to drop. What you are seeing with your difficult child now, with her helping out at the home and how the others like her so much, seeing her relaxed and happy, I've seen that with my difficult child when she was int he sober house too. It literally made me cry to see her so content and happy. So now that she is no longer sober you would think I would be devastated. I was for a while, but I still have that image of her cutting grass at the sober house or working the fund raiser or making dinner for the girls and I remember how how happy she was and I know she can be there again. I think that in some corner of her mind and her heart she remembers those times too and wants them back. I hold those images very close to my heart and it gives me hope.

So for today she is doing exactly what she should be doing and she is changing brain connections and those connections will stay with her. I hope your difficult child feels this peacefulness and acceptance in her soul and never wants to let it go.

Nancy

Thank you so much for this Nancy....you have helped me realize that even if she ends up relapsing and leaving the sober home, we have shown her options. She has seen there is another way to live, no matter what happens in the future. If she throws away everything she has right now, she knows where to go to get it back.

As for B - the more I talk to this young man (and I have now gotten a chance to sit and talk to him on three occasions), the more I really like him. I told my husband if we were back in the days where you marry off your daughters, I would marry her off to him and be happy...lol. Course, I cannot tell difficult child that I like him because then she won't! I am just happy she has such positive influences around her right now that seem to really care about her.

I am trying very hard not to worry. I still feel like the shoe is going to drop at any time. B told me that you have to do something really bad to actually get kicked out of the program. Now they will have you do assignments and put you on restriction if necessary, but to get kicked out, you have to really mess up. So now I just worry that she will say forget this and leave to relapse. Though she received a message the other night that one of her friends was in a car wreck. Normally, she would have bolted to be with her friend. She always takes everyone's problems on as her own. But, she didn't. She told the program director what happened and that she wanted to, but she didn't. That has got to be a good sign!