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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 737047" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Hi Sam, I have missed you. Thank you for your love and support and kind, encouraging words.</p><p>"Practicing living", really living. I am glad that you are working things out, although I do miss your wisdom and voice. I took a hiatus from posting for a time, I needed to switch focus from all of the sadness that surrounded me and a myriad of emotions that I was dealing with my two and their situation.</p><p>Living "despite" my two. That is such a raw, succinct way to put it, but so true, and there is a difference with that, which is comparable to existing, rather than truly living our lives with joy. Practicing living, being present and grateful. Not allowing another’s choices to infiltrate your peace. It is a constant and hard exercise, one that I have had to work at with each twist and turn of this journey.</p><p>I find now, that posting reaffirms my goal. As I stumble on the path, when those old patterns rear up inside, it is a comfort to receive feedback and support. When I reply to a new post, I am speaking to myself as much as I am to the author.</p><p>In my few years here, I have seen members come and go, I often hope that means that they have healed and are, as you wrote <em>practicing living</em>. I do realize that time spent here, is time spent away from moving and doing, but it is a <em>still blessing </em>for me. There will come a time I am sure, when I need to focus on moving forward.</p><p></p><p>I awoke this morning with a certain heaviness that I too well recognize. It is almost a breath holding. I will work at that. The birds are full of morning song, and the garden calls me, digging the soil and planting will help me sort through my feelings. I must soldier on with faith that everything happens for a reason, and we are meant to learn a lesson from it all.</p><p>When I am faced with issues with my two, time has a way of seemingly standing still, but that is a mirage brought on by shifting emotions.</p><p>Time stands still for no one.</p><p>After Hubs passing, I am met with this urgency to live, really live, before the sands in my hourglass run out. Part of that, is learning to live with the choices all of my children make.</p><p>Take each day, each moment at a time and make the most of it.</p><p>I am thankful to be able to come here and know there are folks who understand and share their trials, tribulations and triumphs.</p><p>Sam, thank you so much for replying. I hope all is well with you, and please know, whether you post or not, you are not alone. Take very good care of yourself dear sister, do what you need to do to grab your life back. </p><p>You are an amazing soul.</p><p>(((HUGS)))</p><p>Leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 737047, member: 19522"] Hi Sam, I have missed you. Thank you for your love and support and kind, encouraging words. "Practicing living", really living. I am glad that you are working things out, although I do miss your wisdom and voice. I took a hiatus from posting for a time, I needed to switch focus from all of the sadness that surrounded me and a myriad of emotions that I was dealing with my two and their situation. Living "despite" my two. That is such a raw, succinct way to put it, but so true, and there is a difference with that, which is comparable to existing, rather than truly living our lives with joy. Practicing living, being present and grateful. Not allowing another’s choices to infiltrate your peace. It is a constant and hard exercise, one that I have had to work at with each twist and turn of this journey. I find now, that posting reaffirms my goal. As I stumble on the path, when those old patterns rear up inside, it is a comfort to receive feedback and support. When I reply to a new post, I am speaking to myself as much as I am to the author. In my few years here, I have seen members come and go, I often hope that means that they have healed and are, as you wrote [I]practicing living[/I]. I do realize that time spent here, is time spent away from moving and doing, but it is a [I]still blessing [/I]for me. There will come a time I am sure, when I need to focus on moving forward. I awoke this morning with a certain heaviness that I too well recognize. It is almost a breath holding. I will work at that. The birds are full of morning song, and the garden calls me, digging the soil and planting will help me sort through my feelings. I must soldier on with faith that everything happens for a reason, and we are meant to learn a lesson from it all. When I am faced with issues with my two, time has a way of seemingly standing still, but that is a mirage brought on by shifting emotions. Time stands still for no one. After Hubs passing, I am met with this urgency to live, really live, before the sands in my hourglass run out. Part of that, is learning to live with the choices all of my children make. Take each day, each moment at a time and make the most of it. I am thankful to be able to come here and know there are folks who understand and share their trials, tribulations and triumphs. Sam, thank you so much for replying. I hope all is well with you, and please know, whether you post or not, you are not alone. Take very good care of yourself dear sister, do what you need to do to grab your life back. You are an amazing soul. (((HUGS))) Leafy [/QUOTE]
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