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The meeting was a bust...
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 392172" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>"I assume you are asking me this in order to determine where I stand regarding honesty and integrity. I assure you now, I cannot and will not take on a label which is inappropriate and undeserved. I am being told that you are reluctant to assign to my child a label she DOES deserve, then your question implies you instead want me to assume a label that is not only incorrect, but is only take on in order to (apparently fraudulently) gain services to which we otherwise would be ineligible. WHat sort of message would that send to my children? Especially what sort of message would that send to an already wayward daughter who needs to be shown what the straight and narrow really is?"</p><p></p><p>I would also be taking the line that if the only way to get access to services is to declare yourself an unfit mother, then it is time to begin a major political campaign to make services more available to GOOD parents. Why should only unfit parents get help for their kids? It is putting help in the hands of those who really don't care about their kids anyway and who therefore are less likely to bother about accessing the services. Catch 22 and totally ridiculous.</p><p></p><p>I have had such questions asked of me. I assume that they are simply trying to find out how I feel about the idea, rather than suggesting I actually do it.</p><p></p><p>If such suggestions persist, I would be asking for people on the team who have integrity, not people who are encouraging you to be dishonest in order to teach your child how to live a law-abiding life.</p><p></p><p>You are supposed to feed your child, clothe your child and give your child access to education. You should not have to get up at 5 am with the baby, to make extra provisions available, especially for a child who is being uncooperative, unappreciative and generally difficult. I would be asking these wonderfully helpful people to step in and drive her to the school or her choice. Or let her move in with them so she can have what she wants - not living at home, and the school of her choice. I would also be wanting to know what is so all-fired special about THAT school, over any other educational facility in your area? Who is at that school, perhaps? If she is so determined to get an education, then she can home-school herself at this age.</p><p></p><p>It sounds like you were being pressured; the whole agenda was designed to get difficult child what she wanted rather than support you in your serious concerns. I would be asking these people to sign a waiver that they will take responsibility for your safety and your children's safety when difficult child comes home. Take a leaf out of Linda's book!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 392172, member: 1991"] "I assume you are asking me this in order to determine where I stand regarding honesty and integrity. I assure you now, I cannot and will not take on a label which is inappropriate and undeserved. I am being told that you are reluctant to assign to my child a label she DOES deserve, then your question implies you instead want me to assume a label that is not only incorrect, but is only take on in order to (apparently fraudulently) gain services to which we otherwise would be ineligible. WHat sort of message would that send to my children? Especially what sort of message would that send to an already wayward daughter who needs to be shown what the straight and narrow really is?" I would also be taking the line that if the only way to get access to services is to declare yourself an unfit mother, then it is time to begin a major political campaign to make services more available to GOOD parents. Why should only unfit parents get help for their kids? It is putting help in the hands of those who really don't care about their kids anyway and who therefore are less likely to bother about accessing the services. Catch 22 and totally ridiculous. I have had such questions asked of me. I assume that they are simply trying to find out how I feel about the idea, rather than suggesting I actually do it. If such suggestions persist, I would be asking for people on the team who have integrity, not people who are encouraging you to be dishonest in order to teach your child how to live a law-abiding life. You are supposed to feed your child, clothe your child and give your child access to education. You should not have to get up at 5 am with the baby, to make extra provisions available, especially for a child who is being uncooperative, unappreciative and generally difficult. I would be asking these wonderfully helpful people to step in and drive her to the school or her choice. Or let her move in with them so she can have what she wants - not living at home, and the school of her choice. I would also be wanting to know what is so all-fired special about THAT school, over any other educational facility in your area? Who is at that school, perhaps? If she is so determined to get an education, then she can home-school herself at this age. It sounds like you were being pressured; the whole agenda was designed to get difficult child what she wanted rather than support you in your serious concerns. I would be asking these people to sign a waiver that they will take responsibility for your safety and your children's safety when difficult child comes home. Take a leaf out of Linda's book! Marg [/QUOTE]
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