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General Parenting
The meeting was a bust...
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 392469" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>The really crazy thing about blame the mother (although I do think they realise she is not to blame, it is just a 'cheaper' way to get services) is, as I tell people here on this site regularly - when you get hooked up on blame, you stop being solution-fucossed. And we then pass this on to our kids who whine, "It's not my fault". When ANYONE is whining, "It's not my fault," or "It's not my responsibility," we all go round in circles getting hot under the collar and nothing gets done. Sometimes you have to deliberately step in (as parent, or as advocate) and say, "Let's stop trying to point the finger and blame. Sometimes bad things just happen. Now, what are we going to DO about it?"</p><p></p><p>Action seems scarier, especially to people who have used inaction as a strategy for so long. But it is actually far less stressful and far easier, for all concerned.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 392469, member: 1991"] The really crazy thing about blame the mother (although I do think they realise she is not to blame, it is just a 'cheaper' way to get services) is, as I tell people here on this site regularly - when you get hooked up on blame, you stop being solution-fucossed. And we then pass this on to our kids who whine, "It's not my fault". When ANYONE is whining, "It's not my fault," or "It's not my responsibility," we all go round in circles getting hot under the collar and nothing gets done. Sometimes you have to deliberately step in (as parent, or as advocate) and say, "Let's stop trying to point the finger and blame. Sometimes bad things just happen. Now, what are we going to DO about it?" Action seems scarier, especially to people who have used inaction as a strategy for so long. But it is actually far less stressful and far easier, for all concerned. Marg [/QUOTE]
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The meeting was a bust...
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