This is a test, this is only a test of the difficult adult child arguing system.......

[BusynMember1]

Tanya...all these kids seem to have the same playbook.

You described my daughter. She, looking back, cared little for us nor gave a hoot about what we thought about anything except pot. And the evils of vaccines. Although she rarely spoke to us for any length of time, she could drone on for hours about the PROVEN benefits of pot and the PROVEN evils of vaccines and how the government was actually killing homeopathic practitioners.

We had to sit and listen and never speak our own minds or the speeches would turn into abusive rages about how we never support her and we thought she was stupid.

I do not believe that all kids have a need to seek parents out. Some just don't care and are fine without us and Kay is an example. If my husband and I had stopped giving Kay her wants and needs years ago I believe she would have cut us off then. Wanting our money and sheltering help and money does not in any way mean kids are emotionally attached to parents.

Kay is only interested in what we might offer her. She doesn't love us for who we are or for being her loving parents. I don't believe that all our kids share the same unconditional love for us that we have for them, especially damaged kids like our Kay. Our two other kids love us and want to have a relationship with us outside of money, which they never want from us. Kay? We are only as important as the last "help" we gave her. Sad but I have faced this now

If Kay texted me for any reason I would panic and think"What does she want from us now?" Seeing her name coming up on my phone often made me weak and ill.

God bless us all.

 

[JMom]

Tanya,

My son used to debate all the reasons pot is so good and his mother is so uninformed and not accepting.

This is how I "won" the debate (in my mind, ha ha).

The problem with marijuana is two fold. Pot in itself is probably the least lethal of drugs if smoked in your own home (not mine) and purchased with your own money (not mine).

When a person chooses to smoke pot, they hang out with others who smoke pot and those people hang out with people who smoke pot and pop pills...and so on, you catch the drift- until your who community is filled with people like you.

People who are engaged in criminal behavior will, at some point, lead to incarceration, tickets, etc... so, in short, smoking pot is opening the door to the criminal justice system but doesn't protect you from it.

The second consideration is that it can often times make you estranged to me (mom) and other family and friends because they choose to not be around it. When you work hard to provide a roof over your family's head, food in the cubbard and a vehicle to drive, you want to protect those things. Exposure to illegal substances (pot) and people engaging in criminal behavior puts those things at risk.

Since I choose not to smoke pot and open my door (not yours) to the risk, I have made my choice of my morals and values and they don't align with yours. I will not accept any consequences for your behaviour for choosing to smoke pot.

To answer your debate, dear son, there's absolutely nothing wrong with YOU smoking pot, as long as it isn't in my home, on my dime and you are not around the family under the influence.

And by the way, your sister isn't allowed to give you rides anywhere in her car. You are welcome to buy your own car and assume any risk of being caught with pot.

He gets to be right, but gets to be right somewhere else. Just my two cents.

Love,
Jmom