Hound dog
Nana's are Beautiful
A week. LOL That's how long Nichole has been out on her own and in her apartment with boyfriend.
First enormous blow out was this morning. I heard about it via easy child, who knew because Nichole called sister in law and asked for him to please come make boyfriend leave the apartment because he refused to go one his own.
sister in law is learning.
He told Nichole he couldn't do that unless boyfriend was hurting her. AND he told her that she'd better tell him IF boyfriend ever hurts her cuz he'll be there in under a minute to teach boyfriend a rather *cough* physical lesson on how to treat someone you're supposed to "love". And since she is less than 3 mins from their house........ LOL
AND he told her if boyfriend laid a finger on her she needed to call the police before calling him. While hinting that if nothing else it would prevent sister in law from killing boyfriend.
Then sister in law and easy child sat and stewed because while evidently it was bad, Nichole wouldn't say whether or not boyfriend was being physical. So I'd called easy child to check on when we're going up to see Travis today (yesterday got cancelled) and that's how I found out. They weren't sure if the situation warrented letting me know.
While I was on the phone with easy child Nichole called her and told her they'd resolved the issue "sort of". Then asked easy child to go the the renaissance festival this weekend. She hadn't told easy child what the blow out was over, but when easy child told me that I knew instantly.
Nichole is making just barely enough money to afford to live in that apartment. She is paying all the bills. boyfriend has been riding her since long before the actual move in about how they were gonna end up homeless in less than 3 months because she doesn't make enough money. While rubbing it in that we supposedly kicked her out of the house. The latter isn't true, it was just time for her to grow up and go out and live her life. But while doing all this moaning and groaning about money.........boyfriend hasn't contributed squat of his unemployment checks except what is required by child support, which is basically nothing. Ninety five percent of their furnishings were supplied by Nichole via mother in law and other family contributions. When Nichole bought necessities like a trash can, dish drainer, bucket, broom ect he had a cow over it........
Yet every time I'm near him..........which is much more often of late than I like..........I hear him telling her he wants to go bowling, eat here or there, or do this or that and of course none of it is cheap or in their budget. When she reminds him of that, he goes off on her.
Spoiled brat.
And I hear via the small town grapevine that boyfriend's Dad (whom I happen to respect and like alot) when into Subway (which easy child's mother in law owns and boyfriend used to work at) to get supper the day after the kids moved out. He asked easy child's mother in law if she had a position open for boyfriend. The mother in law said not at the moment but why? And boyfriend's DAd told her when boyfriend realizes that they have no money for his spoiled habits, the boy was gonna need a job.
Unless Nichole let's me in on this one, I'm not letting on I know. easy child still doesn't know I know about the sister in law / Nichole incident since there was no reason for me to get involved. The mess was straightened out between them just fine.
Poor Nichole. Makes my heart hurt. Darn it to hades the girl is working her fanny off trying her utter best......She had to do everything to get moved in from setting up with the landlord, setting up the utilities, and setting up sister in law to help them move.......even though boyfriend was supposed to do most of it. He won't help her with the house, he won't do anything to help dicipline Aubrey (who is turning into a difficult child fast because of it), has hee hawed over getting the day care set up cuz there is no one to watch Aubrey once my school starts (he was supposed to have had that done weeks ago), made sure once again his classes conflict with Nichole's work hours so she's in a lurch for a sitter at least 3 days a week...........that one easy child and sister in law covered for her, plus although today was the only fight they've had.......he's been sleeping on the couch since day 1, he won't sleep in the bed with her.
She is so having her Happily Ever After bubble busted big time. I was packing the remaining things in her room the other day and came across her diary. Read her last entry and it spoke about how finally the dream she'd had since she was 16 of the 3 of them living together as a real family was coming true........ And so yeah. Bad enough she's dealing with boyfriend really not wanting to be with her, but now she's having that little girl dream (and we all do it to some extent) shattered on top of it. That's a loo loo all by itself.
I know via sources that it got slipped to boyfriend's parents the kids were planning on moving out on their own. boyfriend had refused to tell his parents up until then he was planning on moving out with Nichole with the excuse to her that his Mom would freak. (hmmmmm didn't he use this excuse when she was preggers?) Sooooooooooo, Mom and Dad found out......and ran with it!!! LMAO They were all but pushing the boy out the door.......and made it clear he's not welcome back.
I find that very funny.........except that may make Nichole's problems with him worse. I never expected him to follow thru with the move. I don't think he ever planned to. And in fact they have a major blow out the day before.....just as I'd expected. So I was a bit suspicious when he did actually move with her, Seems his parents prevented him from being able to back out at the last minute.
Everything has landed on Nichole's shoulders. So far she's holding up fairly well, but I am worried. I had hoped realizing that she can work, rent and apartment and pay her bills without boyfriend's help would help her have the confidence to throw off some of the control he has over her. I'm not seeing it yet. He still makes all the demands, he still runs the show......and she still gives in.
Only good thing I see is that is is majorly chafting under the bit. It's sticking in her craw that she's doing all the work and supporting them but boyfriend thinks he gets to call all the shots and do nothing.
easy child and sister in law are worried about her. I'm worried about her. We all fear now that there are no parents near to monitor them that boyfriend is going to esculate the violence. We're giving her as much support as possible while having to leave it up to her.
Do I regret my decision to give her a move out date? No. Nichole was ready. It was time. I tried to get her to be on her own a few months before letting boyfriend move in. His joining her was her idea. I could've waited years and it wind up the exact same way. Cuz as long as boyfriend can use her........he's not going anywhere.
I hope since this couldn't be avoided that Nichole figures out fast that boyfriend isn't going to change, that her Happily Ever After doesn't exist because boyfriend doesn't care about her......he's just too wrapped up in himself. I have doubts he truly cares for Aubrey. He's given me plenty of reason to believe he's there for her only to impress his parents and stay in their good graces, especially his Dad......in order to inherit someday.
I know this is something Nichole has to learn all by herself. Doesn't make it any less painful to watch. I just hope she learns fast.
First enormous blow out was this morning. I heard about it via easy child, who knew because Nichole called sister in law and asked for him to please come make boyfriend leave the apartment because he refused to go one his own.
sister in law is learning.
He told Nichole he couldn't do that unless boyfriend was hurting her. AND he told her that she'd better tell him IF boyfriend ever hurts her cuz he'll be there in under a minute to teach boyfriend a rather *cough* physical lesson on how to treat someone you're supposed to "love". And since she is less than 3 mins from their house........ LOL AND he told her if boyfriend laid a finger on her she needed to call the police before calling him. While hinting that if nothing else it would prevent sister in law from killing boyfriend.
Then sister in law and easy child sat and stewed because while evidently it was bad, Nichole wouldn't say whether or not boyfriend was being physical. So I'd called easy child to check on when we're going up to see Travis today (yesterday got cancelled) and that's how I found out. They weren't sure if the situation warrented letting me know.
While I was on the phone with easy child Nichole called her and told her they'd resolved the issue "sort of". Then asked easy child to go the the renaissance festival this weekend. She hadn't told easy child what the blow out was over, but when easy child told me that I knew instantly.
Nichole is making just barely enough money to afford to live in that apartment. She is paying all the bills. boyfriend has been riding her since long before the actual move in about how they were gonna end up homeless in less than 3 months because she doesn't make enough money. While rubbing it in that we supposedly kicked her out of the house. The latter isn't true, it was just time for her to grow up and go out and live her life. But while doing all this moaning and groaning about money.........boyfriend hasn't contributed squat of his unemployment checks except what is required by child support, which is basically nothing. Ninety five percent of their furnishings were supplied by Nichole via mother in law and other family contributions. When Nichole bought necessities like a trash can, dish drainer, bucket, broom ect he had a cow over it........
Yet every time I'm near him..........which is much more often of late than I like..........I hear him telling her he wants to go bowling, eat here or there, or do this or that and of course none of it is cheap or in their budget. When she reminds him of that, he goes off on her.
Spoiled brat.
And I hear via the small town grapevine that boyfriend's Dad (whom I happen to respect and like alot) when into Subway (which easy child's mother in law owns and boyfriend used to work at) to get supper the day after the kids moved out. He asked easy child's mother in law if she had a position open for boyfriend. The mother in law said not at the moment but why? And boyfriend's DAd told her when boyfriend realizes that they have no money for his spoiled habits, the boy was gonna need a job.
Unless Nichole let's me in on this one, I'm not letting on I know. easy child still doesn't know I know about the sister in law / Nichole incident since there was no reason for me to get involved. The mess was straightened out between them just fine.
Poor Nichole. Makes my heart hurt.
Darn it to hades the girl is working her fanny off trying her utter best......She had to do everything to get moved in from setting up with the landlord, setting up the utilities, and setting up sister in law to help them move.......even though boyfriend was supposed to do most of it. He won't help her with the house, he won't do anything to help dicipline Aubrey (who is turning into a difficult child fast because of it), has hee hawed over getting the day care set up cuz there is no one to watch Aubrey once my school starts (he was supposed to have had that done weeks ago), made sure once again his classes conflict with Nichole's work hours so she's in a lurch for a sitter at least 3 days a week...........that one easy child and sister in law covered for her, plus although today was the only fight they've had.......he's been sleeping on the couch since day 1, he won't sleep in the bed with her.She is so having her Happily Ever After bubble busted big time. I was packing the remaining things in her room the other day and came across her diary. Read her last entry and it spoke about how finally the dream she'd had since she was 16 of the 3 of them living together as a real family was coming true........ And so yeah. Bad enough she's dealing with boyfriend really not wanting to be with her, but now she's having that little girl dream (and we all do it to some extent) shattered on top of it. That's a loo loo all by itself.
I know via sources that it got slipped to boyfriend's parents the kids were planning on moving out on their own. boyfriend had refused to tell his parents up until then he was planning on moving out with Nichole with the excuse to her that his Mom would freak. (hmmmmm didn't he use this excuse when she was preggers?) Sooooooooooo, Mom and Dad found out......and ran with it!!! LMAO They were all but pushing the boy out the door.......and made it clear he's not welcome back.
I find that very funny.........except that may make Nichole's problems with him worse. I never expected him to follow thru with the move. I don't think he ever planned to. And in fact they have a major blow out the day before.....just as I'd expected. So I was a bit suspicious when he did actually move with her, Seems his parents prevented him from being able to back out at the last minute.
Everything has landed on Nichole's shoulders. So far she's holding up fairly well, but I am worried. I had hoped realizing that she can work, rent and apartment and pay her bills without boyfriend's help would help her have the confidence to throw off some of the control he has over her. I'm not seeing it yet. He still makes all the demands, he still runs the show......and she still gives in.
Only good thing I see is that is is majorly chafting under the bit. It's sticking in her craw that she's doing all the work and supporting them but boyfriend thinks he gets to call all the shots and do nothing.
easy child and sister in law are worried about her. I'm worried about her. We all fear now that there are no parents near to monitor them that boyfriend is going to esculate the violence. We're giving her as much support as possible while having to leave it up to her.
Do I regret my decision to give her a move out date? No. Nichole was ready. It was time. I tried to get her to be on her own a few months before letting boyfriend move in. His joining her was her idea. I could've waited years and it wind up the exact same way. Cuz as long as boyfriend can use her........he's not going anywhere.
I hope since this couldn't be avoided that Nichole figures out fast that boyfriend isn't going to change, that her Happily Ever After doesn't exist because boyfriend doesn't care about her......he's just too wrapped up in himself. I have doubts he truly cares for Aubrey. He's given me plenty of reason to believe he's there for her only to impress his parents and stay in their good graces, especially his Dad......in order to inherit someday.
I know this is something Nichole has to learn all by herself. Doesn't make it any less painful to watch. I just hope she learns fast.
But this is a tough lesson she has to learn on her own.
