louise2350
Active Member
When my d.d. was living with us as a family years ago, when I wished she wasn't living with us, I always felt guilty having that thought. At the time, I thought I should put up with her ways - coming home so drunk she didn't remember her actions, disrespecting me and scaring her little sister, etc. I now realize that no one is expected to put up with that behavior and I was justified in wanting her out of the house. Others who haven't been through what all of us here have been through, will think it's awful to want your grown child out of the house, but what other alternative is there when the adult child won't agree to good therapy or try to make their life better and not be constantly having others live in chaos and anxiety due to their behaviors? I, too, felt like I was an enabler towards my d.d. when she was in my life. I couldn't say "no" to her in many instances - I just was so emotionally tired from all she was putting me and her family through that I thought it was easier just to let her have her way in things. Although I haven't heard from my d.d in five years I have gained much peace and pray for her always. I would like to hear from her and I do forgive her for all of the past heartaches she put upon me and her family, but this is her choice in not having me in her life so I can't do much about that. I'm sure she's not in a good place right now and I do hope things change for her. It's so nice to see I'm not alone and that others here have or are going through the same things as I went through. Many blessings to all of you.
