A few changes, a few steps back (long post)

[AppleCori]

sWhat does he cry about? Is it 'poor me' or is it remorse for his wrongdoings and the pain he has caused others?

Are they crocodile tears or real remorse?

Yeah! for not giving the baby an unpronounceable name!

I grew up with a really unusual last name. I have never heard of another person with that name. Literally. Not in this country nor any other country. No relatives have it. Because my step-dad made it up. His sons have all changed their last names. Daughters married. I always thought it was a kinda pretty name, myself, but dealing with it was very difficult.

Is he any easier to live with?

 

[TerryJ2]

AppleCori, he is overwhelmed. He ramps up with his anxiety, either talking to friends or his ex-girlfriend or his new girlfriend, because he has been unsuccessful getting a job, and the baby is a month away, and then he needs a smoke--either cigarettes or pot--and takes it out on me if I won't take him somewhere NOW. I can always tell when he wants to smoke because it's all about going NOW. And needing the car by himself. NO, Mom, you CAN'T drive me!
The last time he did that, about 3 days ago, I held my ground and he followed me out to the car, crying. He was spent. The same way he'd scream and yell as a toddler, and then finally, he'd break. He'd cry for about 15 min., sleep for a long time, and wake up calm and centered. Cheerful, even.
This time, I walked back into the house with him and had him take a clonidine and a lithium and sit on the couch. I spoke in a calm voice, giving simple directions.
He's got too many things going on in his head, too many advice-givers, and needs to take it one piece at a time.